Thursday, December 31, 2009


TONIGHT IS NEW YEAR'S EVE, That evening on which many here in Alexandria will be in need of taxicabs, which is good as I l am in need of dollars. Even though the occasion represents nothing really any more important than the rolling over of a car odometer - and arguably a great deal less - it is used by millions as an excuse to go out and get pig-faced drunk. Therefore I shall cease operations at 11:30 PM. I am so NOT putting up with a crowd of asshole drunks .

With this last post of the year I am announcing the "Winner" of the Idiot of the Year Contest. Here's how it works:

Every month I select the worst idiot I have met in the course of driving the hack. The qualifications are as follows: The candidate must be a normal person of average or above intelligence. Retards, mental cases, etc cannot help it, and this is NOT a great honor. The candidate cannot be drunk, because in the competition for Idiot of the Year, alcohol is a performance-enhancing drug.

The stupidity demonstrated must be truly stupendous and patently incommensurate with the intelligence and standing of the candidate.

Simple stupid driving does not qualify; if it did i would have too many candidates. Egregious road-raging, as with this year's winner however, does.


Last month I was going eastbound on West Braddock Road. An SUV ahead was turning left, so I had to stop. Some idiot behind me was blowing his horn, and when the SUV cleared the roadway he blasted again as I began to proceed. So I slammed on the brakes. And he blasted the horn yet again. THEN he began following me. I became a bit concerned so I turned down several side streets and sure enough, he kept on my tail. So I proceeded to the King Street Metro with the candidate in tow. He parked behind me on the taxi stand for abot 30 seconds and then pulled up alongside me, showing me his cell-phone and unleashing an obscenity-laced tirade about how he was "reporting" me to the "dispatcher". It was then I noticed the 6-year-old kid in the back seat. So I told him what a clas act he was putting on for the kid to follow and told him I was going to report him to Child Protective Services, whereupon he turned pale and got the hell outta there.

AND SO, MISTER ROAD RAGER, WHOEVER YOU ARE; BEC AUSE you act like a child when you don't get your way;
BECAUSE even though you were in such a goddamned hurry, you still found time to chase me around;
BECAUSE in so doing you did not know me, did not know if i might be armed, etc;
BECAUSE in so doing you potentially endangered not just your self, but a young child;
BECAUSE additionally you provided an horrible example for that child;
BECAUSE your stupendous ego is obviously of more importance to you than your own safety not to mention that of said child;


Now go suck a donkey dick, you fucking jerk.

Happy New Year to everyone else!

Tuesday, December 22, 2009



COULD IT BE that they are sooooo concerned that you will get a boo-boo and not be able to get cared for? Hell no. They don't give a good Goddamn about "the little guy" they so like to say they are championing. To them, the little guy is just that, a pissant. Just ask the flight attendant that Shecky Schumer called a "bitch" for asking him to turn off his cell phone during takeoff. They don't give a flying FUCK how many people do not want this dog's breakfast of statist mandates. Harry Reid has all but told us we will get it and we will like it (or else).

ACTUALLY WHAT HAS THE RATZ ALL TURNED ON ABOUT THIS "HEALTH CARE BILL" IS THAT IT IS NOT ABOUT HEALTH CARE AT ALL. IT IS A GOD DAMNED FUCKING TAX BILL. Just like wabbits wuv cawwots, DemonRatz love taxes. Wait! you say. Tax bills have to originate in the HOUSE, and this is a SENATE BILL.

HO ho ho.

YOU SEE, DEAR READER, THE PRESENT BILL ORIGINATED IN THE HOUSE WAYS AND MEANS COMMITTEE AS A TAX BILL. I found this out when my Senator Mark Warner directed me to his FAQ on the topic. This TAX BILL originated in the Ways and Means committee and was sent over to the Senate, where the House language got stripped out and the Senate language was inserted. Only the bill number and title remained. So technically this TAX BILL originated in the House; but not one word of the present form of the bill has been debated in the House; and their hope is that they can get the Senate package approved by a "reconciliation committee". It is easier to bamboozle, bribe and intimidate 60 senators than it is to do so to a couple hundred Representatives.. You see the vile little game??? I hope you do.

NOW YOU MIGHT ASK WHY THE RATZ WOULD TRY TO GET A TAX BILL PASSED THIS WAY. The answer is simple. They can sell it to as many folks as possible as "Insurance"; but if it is ever challenged in court, they can say it is nothing but aa TAX BILL on income as allowed by the 16th Amendment. They want more money - hell they will need it to pay off the Senators they bribed to pass it - and they will sell their souls, your bodies, and this very nation to get this illegal money-and-power grab signed into law.

I SEE NO OTHER RECOURSE IF THIS ATROCITY IS PASSED AND SIGNED INTO LAW THAN REBELLION. Let it begin at the ballot box. Let it be unrelenting on the soap box. And let us hope we will not need the cartridge box. But this design to reduce us under despotism cannot, must not, AND WILL NOT BE ALLOWED TO STAND.

Sunday, December 20, 2009


WELL HERE IT IS SUNDAY AND ABOUT 48 HOURS AFTER THE SNOW FIRST STARTED FALLING IN THE "BLIZZARD OF 2009" The snow finally stopped sometime around one AM this morning, making this a 29-hour weather event. Now I have been in the DC area since October of 1973; and although I have seen a greater quantity of snow I have NEVER seen it snow for a whole day and night. Hells bells, this doesn't even happen in my native Ohio very often.

I did not even bother trying to dig out until about 5:30 PM and it took me over an hour to free the cab and get going. Even now however the plow crews are just starting to get caught up. Major through roads are mainly clear but secondary streets are touch-and-go and the conditions of secondary streets depend mainly on how badly the residents wanted to get out. Some of then have been shoveled by the residents, but the plows have not gotten to most of them.

The idiots who live here in Northern Virginia however do not listen to the police when they ask anyone who does not absolutely have to be out in this to stay put. The roads are an absolute obstacle course of stuck vehicles and accidents. And lets not even mention, the pedestrians; who walk in the middle of the road and force drivers to slam on the brakes resulting in everything from spinouts to collisions. And, here in recession-proof Richie Richville we have dolts who strap on their cross-country skis and treat the snow-clogged streets as their personal schuss.

I don't know what the official total snowfall is, but around here the shit is knee-deep which in my case is about 22 inches.

There is a huge demand for cabs right now and you might think I would make a lot of money from going out and driving, and you might wonder why a cabbie is blogging with everybody and his uncle deluging the company with calls. Obviously you have never done what I do for a living. People call cabs because they cannot get their cars out of their streets; so they call us and if a driver is stupid enough to actually take a call, often as not he winds up just as stuck as the people who called; who half the time have decided they don't want to go after all. It is pretty hard to be polite to such hammerheads, especially when you wish you could use a tire iron to bludgeon some sense into them; so for my part I just cruise for street pickups.

My hat is off to the little shops and restaurants whose brave employees have opened up through this freakish event. At least I have not lacked for food, drink, etc; and some of them have asked why, since they were able to get to work, that I am not working. Like most people in this liberal-infested dump they don't bother thinking. All they had to do was drive TO work. For me, driving IS work.

However, tomorrow is Monday and despite government closures there is still going to be a ton of business, and not just hammerheads wanting to go out and get drunk. I hope to hell the plows get more work done by 4:30 AM; because snow or no, tomorrow I gotta go out and make it happen. Getting sots to a bar is not essential work. Getting people to work is. Wish me luck.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Letter From The Editor: EPA OVERREACH

I HAVE NOT WRITTEN HERE FOR A WHILE. THERE IS JUST SO MUCH HAPPENING AND SO FAST THAT IT IS HARD TO KEEP UP. Even when I have thought I could have been confounded, amazed, astonished and infuriated to the limits of human tolerance, a new outrage has come along seemingly daily if not hourly. I must add that one bright spot was seeing "president" Obama accepting his Nobel Peace Prize and then lecturing the idiot peacenik Norskers about the necessity of warfare in defense of liberty. Oh, I do not believe for a minute that he believed - or possibly even understood - a word of what he said (except the parts wherein he praised himself). But Obama is all about which way the wind blows, and right now the wind is not blowing his way. However it was worth watching the Nobel Committee sit and listen to a speech basically telling them that their pacifist attitudes need to be adjusted to reality; and seeing the looks on their faces that said (as many Americans now also feel) "Why in HELL did we vote for this TOOL??"

And then there was Tiger Woods, who evidently only uses the big head on the golf course and is guided at all other times by the little head of Mister Wiener. But really, who gives a damn about Tiger Woods? Some guys canoodle and lose everything, and everybody knows some schmoe who has done exactly that. Tiger could split the community property with his wife, pay off anyone who needs to be paid off, and still have enough dough to live very well indeed. So fuck him.

But the Left keeps throwing sucker punches; and a few days ago one came out of the blue: The Environmental Protection Agency has decided to take what they like to call a "Supreme Court Mandate" concerning regulation of CO2 and run with it.

The (Director?) of the EPA is some goddamned bitch who is a fanatical environmental wacko. She has announced her intent to agressively implement controls on CO2; which by the bye is what every living thing exhales every minute of every hour of every day. The way this Leftist battleaxe looks at things, she has the power to come into your bathroom and shut off the hot water because heating it requires burning fuel and "producing" CO2. And I am not kidding either, she is just that unhinged.

Now this obsession with so-called "greenhouse gases" is ostensibly to protect you, me, and the Planet. But in reality what this Leftist - words fail me - cunt wants is what Obama and Reid and Pelosi want with their "cap and trade" and Obamacare crapola. They do NOT give a good god damn about sick little kids, "The Uninsured", "The Environment", melting ice caps, cute little 10-foot-tall maneating polar bears (who are doing just fine thank you, "global warming" or no), or anything else save for POWER and CONTROL.

So the EPA wants to tell me I cannot have a hot shower?? FUCK YOU. I will have you know, Little Ms. Bitch; that not only do I shower every day in water hot as I can stand (The better to get the diirt off) but I also stay in there a long time with the water running at FULL BLAST thanks to the fact that I have surgically removed the idiot flow restrictor on my shower massaage unit (and now the massage is dandy!) AND I shave at the end while my beard is nice and soft.

And since I have a couple of guitars, I keep the AC on all day and night 24-7 in the summer so as to have a constant temperature so they won't warp. How you EnviroNazis like THAT shit? HUH??

The time for these jokers is short, indeed. But we in the meantime nust resist with everthing we have. If we do not, there may not be an America to have an election in come November 2010.

Monday, December 7, 2009



When we watched the attacks of 9-11 take place, we felt a similar shock as our parents did on hearing the news of Pearl Harbor. Now we are at war with an enemy even more fanatical and a shadowy one at that.

But no mention of this from the floor of the House or the Senate. It would be an inconvenient reminder that one does not read the enemy his rights and try him in a civilian court in a war. In a war one kills the enemy until the enemy surrenders. The present government, full of weaklings, traitors and cowards, does not want to remind the sheeple of what war is. They want to pretend that we are conducting some sort of criminal investigation. Besides, they are busy trying to engineer a device called "Obamacare" which will do NOTHING to benefit the citizenry but which will open a door to total abrogation of almost every individual right we think we have.

Remember Pearl Harbor. And repulse these DemonRat sneak attacks on our freedoms.

Thursday, November 26, 2009


WELL YOU MAY WONDER JUST EXACTLY WHAT WE AT THE ALEXANDRIA DAILY POOP FEEL THANKFUL FOR THIS ANNUAL DAY OF GRATITUDE; what with a communist nincompoop running the country (to the ground) and bowing to foreign princes and putting war criminals into our civilian criminal justice system; with a recession that just seems like it will never let up, with us personally on the verge of losing everything and we do mean everything. And we do say that we try to be cynical but it is really hard keeping up these days. But we will give it a go.

Let us give thanks that "president" Obama has not been killed, despite the fact that a couple of party crashers fast-talked their way uninvited to a STATE DINNER AT THE WHITE HOUSE OH MAH GAWD. We at the ADP cannot stand "president" Obama, but we prefer he be impeached or voted out of the White House and not carried out. Otherwise the riots that would ensue would be horrendous. And let's not even mention the possibility of "president" Barack Hussein Obama in Arlington Cemetery. Isn't it bad enough that Ted Kennedy is taking his dirt nap there?

Let us be thankful for our Constitution, which mandates that the entire US House of Representaatives and one third of the Senate be up for grabs every two years. This arrangement has forced the hand of the DemonRatz. They have gone too far too fast and America is waking up to the hustle. The "wait a minute, not so fast" instinct has kicked in. And indeed Obama and the Ratz stink so badly that not even Saturday Night Live can stand it.

And thanks be for the blessing of the talent of whomever hacked and published the Emails of a cabal of corrupt "scientists" who have been trying to scare us all about "global Warming" or "climate change" or whatever they are going to call it now that it has been exposed as a fraud.

And personally we are thankful for hope itself; and for the good friends with whom we will partake of the Thanksgiving feast later this afternoon. Whether you are feasting and hanging out with friends, family or both this day; be aware that in the end it is just that closeness and bonhommie that makes life livable even in these somewhat dark days. The smile and the laughter of a friend or a family member is something money cannot buy. But in extremity it can easily be obtained by the simple device of falling down slam on your ass.

From the multiple personalities who produce and edit the Alexandria Daily Poop.

Friday, November 20, 2009

GOODBYEll OPRAH WINFREY (Has it really been 25 years?)

THE ALEXANDRIA DAILY POOP WOULD LIKE TO BID FAREWELL TO OPRAH WINFREY AND HER TALK SHOW. Unfortunately we will not be able to do this until next year. Besides, we will believe it when we see it happen.
Oprah evidently cannot wait either as she got all weepy during the announcement of her (allegedly) pending retirement. Most long-running hosts (Johnny Carson, eg) save the waterworks for the final signoff but Oprah has - face it, people - made a living out of being a drama queen. Hence the boohoohoo one year in advance..
As far as we can tell, Oprah is mainly notable for being a former fat pig who lost so much weight that she pulled a kid's wagon full of lard to show the equivalent amount of fat she had lost. That, and her book club; and most recently her endorsement of Barack Hussein Obama last year during the elections. Oh yes, and she is also one of those uber rich lefties who support higher taxes on the rich except, of course her and her ilk because; being one of the "liberal elite" she can spend her money wisely. As for the rest of us, we need to have our money confiscated for our own good.
Basically Oprah Winfrey has made her money by being a professional public spectacle. She has pulled this off successfully, but we at the Alexandria Daily Poop have for the most part ignored her as the inconsequential twit that she is. Twenty-five years? She has been in the public eye that long?

Well, toodles, Oprah. Maybe you will finally shut the fuck up and go back to porking out. We can only hope.....

Thursday, November 12, 2009


SOMEONE MADE A COMMENT ON THE MOST RECENT POST ON THIS BLOG; TO WIT: "ISLAM EXPLAINED" This comment was made anonymously, and for the purposes of this post I am dropping the editorial "we" and addressing the matter personally.

I do not require folks to identify themselves when they make comments. But the commentator addressing the aforementioned post said: "Catch AIDS and die like you deserve you filthy faggot". I deleted that comment, but on reflection I have decided to put it up front here so the world can see what an ass the commentor is. I have the following to say to this person:

YOU, SIR, ARE A FUCKING COWARD. I put my name to my statements. You did not put your name to yours. You are a pissant, bub. An inconsequential pissant who is scared to death to put his name to his own words. I dare you, you despicable pussy, to post the comment with your name on it. Of course you will not.

I do not hide my name or who I am. I do not say or do or post one single thing on the Internet or anywhere else that I would not be quite happy to see published on the front page of the local newspaper. YOU however seem to think you can hide behind the Internet. You are a sissyboy. There are faggots galore who could knock you into next week, and you are obviously scared shitless. You poor pathetic little pussyboy. Go suck your thumb.

Monday, November 9, 2009


WE AT THE ALEXANDRIA DAILY POOP HAVE NOT ADDRESSED THE TERRORIST MASSACRE AT FT. HOOD, KILLEEN, TEXAS because we believe suffficient has been written and said by persons closer to the investigation than we are. However many people do not realize that the globe is caught up in a famly feud that makes the Hatfields and McCoys look like an episode of "Everybody Loves Raymond". Here is how the whole shebang we are in now got started:

ONCE UPON A TIME ABOUT 4,000 YEARS AGO there was a man named Abraham who married a woman named Sarah. Christians, Jews, and Moslems claim Abraham as the founder of their respective Faiths. Well, Abraham and Sarah were married for years and no luck with kids. So Sarah gave Abraham permission to ssleep with her maid so that he might have an heir. Abraham did so, and the maid, Hagar, gave birth to a little boy named Ishmael.

BUT SARAH BECAME JEALOUS OF HAGAR and threw her and the boy out of the house after smacking Hagar around. Now God, it is believed, had promised Abraham that He, God, would "Make of" Abraham "a great multitude". He also gave this promise to Ishmael. Anyway Sarah then herself became prefgnant by Abraham and bore him a son named Isaac. Then Sarah let Haagar come back into the house. They never really got along after that, though......

AND SO IT WAS THAT ISSAC BECAME THE FATHER OF JOSEPH, THE PATRIARCH OF ISRAEL AND THE JEWS, from whom would come Jesus and Christianity. Ishmael became the patriarch of the nomadic Arab tribes, who went about worshipping various versions of the Sumerian gods Baal and Molech.

FAST FORWARD TWO THOUSAND FIVE HUNDRED YEARS OR SO. An Arab named Mohammed had a desire to unite all the Arab people, who fought each other over who had the best Baal and/or who Baal liked best; as well as over pastures and wells and just about anything else they could think of. Now Mohammed was nothing if not observant; and he observed that the Jews and the Christians seemed to have their acts pretty much together. And he divined that the concept of one God meant a few hundred less gods to fight about.

AND SO MOHAMMED HAD A MASTER STROKE OF INSPIRATION. He picked and chose verses from the Jewish and Christian Scriptures and mixed in some uniquely Arab viewpoints to make the whole thing go down well with Arabs; and created a religious text called the Koran, which he peddled as having been divinely revealed to he, Mohammed. In another masterpiece of political acumen, he had the various tribes deposit their idols to be "imprisioned" in the Kaaba Stone in Mecca. That way they could still be kinda-sorta bowing to the old gods when they faced Mecca to pray. (We bet you didn't know what was inside that big thing, did you??) For stubborn folks, there was the famous "conversion by the sword".

HOWEVER ISLAM'S BIGGEST APPEAL TO THE ARABS WAS AN APPEAL OF GROUP VICTIMHOOD. Ishmael, said Mohammed, was Abraham's Firstborn Son and Issaac had stolen the Blessings of God that passed through Abraham, and so you see no wonder the Jews and Christians were doing so well while the Arabs wandered the desert. The lousy Jews stole the Arab birthright to rule the planet. The whole business got out of hand rather quickly. Things got rather bloody in a lot of places, and cracks were developing in Islam itself.

THEN, WITHOUT HAVING BOTHERED TO NAME HIS SUCCESSOR AS HEAD OF ISLAM ON EARTH NOR TO DESIGNATE A PROCESS FOR CHOOSING ONE, MOHAMMAD DIED. This split Islam into two warrring camps: The Shia who believe the leader must be a descendant of Mohammed; and the Sunni who believe he should be chosen by the Imams. And these two split up into various sects. And the sons of Ishmael continue to fight the sons of Issaac (when they are not fighting each other) to this day.

NOW THIS WOULD NOT AMOUNT TO MUCH MORE THAN YOUR AVERAGE FAMILY FIGHT OVER WHO GETS GRANDPA'S HOUSE AND CAR except that this whole mess happens to have been plopped down on top of the largest deposits of energy reserves on the planet. Now the whole world has been dragged into this deadly family feud, and the dangers and consequenses are enourmous.

ALL THIS, because 4,000 years ago a married man named Abraham slept with a woman other than his wife. It is a real corker, isn't it??

Monday, November 2, 2009


IT HAS BEEN SUGGESTED TO US THAT A GOOD WAY OF INCREASING OUR READERSHIP WOULD BE TO INCLUDE A "SPORTS COLUMN". Now while the title of this collection of - well, whatever - is titled "The Alexandria Daily Poop"; we rather doubt anyone takes a laptop into the crapper to read us. (We do not doubt that there are those who communicate electronically whilst relieving themselves, we have beheld a "Twitter" message consisting of the words : "still pooping"; and we are NOT making this up.)

ACTUALLY however we have an aversion to sports for several reasons. When we were 14 or so and in a game of sandlot football, we caught a pass interception. And promptly ran it into our own team's end zone. On our last visit to our hometown we ran into an old classmate and the first thing he mentioned was that long-ago mistake. Forty two years is a long time not to live something down. But our aversion to sports is not solely due to this embarrasssing incident.

NOR IS IT SOLELY DUE to the abysmal performance of the "local" football and baseball teams (the Washington Redskins and the Washington Nationals, respectively). A clue to our aversion, however, can be obtained by noticing the quote marks around "local" above.

THE WORDS TO THE "REDSKINS THEME SONG" include the words "Fight on 'til you have won Sons of Washington!". Yeah, right. The last "son of Washington" was (correct me if I am wrong) Sonny Juergenson; and he was (again correct me if I am wrong but with that accent...) a hick from the Maryland suburbs. That;s like calling us a "son of Alexandria" when in fact we were born in Indianapolis and grew up in Huber Heights, Ohio. Whatever these Redskins are, they are not sons of anywhere NEAR Washington DC (nor the vicinity). Moreover what they mostly are and have been for several years and a half dozen coaches (or more, we have stopped keeping track) a bunch of showboating primadonnas with one eye on the TV cameras when both eyes should be on the game.

SIMILARLY OUR "BASEBALL TEAM" the Washington Nationals is actually a team from the Northern Autonomous Territory (AKA "Canada") whose record was so abysmal that the team was renamed and the stats jettisoned. Or maybe "Expos" is exactly what a Washington pol wants to avoid. In any event, another bunch of out of towners posing as the home team. And not much there to root root root for, unless you want to root in the ground with your nose for their standings

BASKETBALL?? The old "Capitol Bullets" had their name changed to the "Washington Wizards" by folks who were concerned about the violence in the National Capital City. Well, the violence continues unnabated but the "Wizards" are becoming legendary for transforming success into failure. They ought to be re-renamed the "Reverse Merlins"

HOCKEY!!! Yeah, we got a pretty good hockey team. Bunch of goddamned Russians like some REAL AMERICANS MANAGED TO DEFEAT AT LAKE PLACID IN 1980 but at least they manage to win a few.

There is solace, however, in the fact that the teams which beat the pants off "our guys" are not really "their guys" either. Players criss-cross the Nation (and the globe!) either being "draft picks" or whoring themselves independently as "free agents' being bought and sold by representatives of consortiums or dumbasses like Redskins owner Danny Snyder.

WE DO NOT DOUBT THAT ATHLETIC ENDEAVORS ARE DEMANDING and that watching skilled competition is exciting. But for all any of it really means anymore, what with the "home team" being from everywhere but "home" and with the players being called "role models" except when they are staging dogfights, injecting steroids, shooting themselves acidentally in nightclubs etc; the teams might as well be called "Western District 1" or "Eastern District 4".

THEREFORE this is the first and the last time we will write of such twaddle on these Epages. Of all human endeavor, professional sports is perhaps the most over rated and least consequential, or at least so say we at the Alexandria Daily Poop.

Sunday, October 11, 2009


ON A RECENT EPISODE OF THE "LARS LARSON" TALK SHOW WE HAD OCCASION TO HEAR NOTED CONSERVATIVE ROCK STAR TED NUGENT expound on the flaws in "pacifist" thinking. Ted pointed out that for anybody to eat EVEN TOFU, living things had to die; that bugs and gophers and such had to be eradicated from the soyabean patch so as to ensure that they did not eat the food before humans did. At a minmum these beings were denied food and died of starvation, and in most instances they were killed outright; all so some "nipple-pierced wierdo can eat tofu and say he's not harming anything"

NOW OF COURSE TED IS RIGHT, bur we got to thinking about various responses that might be posited by members of the Left and the Vegan crowd and/or parroted by the jejune youngsters these evil people decieve. And the first thing to come to mind was "organic Vegan" gardening wherein "natural" repellents are used to dissuade uninvited guests from the soybean harvest. Well, other beings - and according to Vegan theory, an aphid's life is as valuable as a human child's - STILL starve to death. But let's just say there is something called "common-sense" Veganism. There isn't, of course; but just for the sake of argument....

SO. WITH "NATURAL REPELLENTS" AND NETS TO KEEP OUT THE STARVING BUNNYKINS (and assuming there is some way to deal with gophers and moles) and an intense amount of labor in growing and processing, the end result is "certified organic Vegan tofu". Now, if your mission in doing all of this was to get everyone to eat "harm-free" tofu, we would think that it might be offered at the same price as "evil tofu" and that greater sales volume would make up the profit difference, or even (Leftie Vegans being by and large rabidly anti-Capitalistic) just provide enough to keep the old tofu commune producing. Yes, we would think so. But we would be wrong.

SUCH VARIETIES OF TOFU EXIST and they cost much more than ordinary capitalist-produced tofu. These chunks of soy protien are almost invariably wrapped with labels featuring sunrises and buttercups and butterflies and labelled "Organic" or "Artisanal" or some such. W.C. Fields would be at awe at such a scam. "Artisanal" tofu!! What a crock. (and some of it is in fact sold by the crock!) You see, these tie-dyed throwbacks need all that extra cash to convert their Mercedes to run on marijuana-seed oil or some such crapola.

NOT THAT THE REST OF US OUGHT TO BE GADDING ABOUT WHEREVER WE WANT in a car fuelled by cannabis byproduct or anything else. According to the Vegan Left, we need to cram ourselves as tightly together as possible and rely on whatever shops are "in walking distance" to (hopefully) provide what we need (which the Left will tell us what that consists of). We are baffled, given the "peace and love" mentality professed by the Left, why they have this attitude. All experience has shown that, the closer human beings are forced to live to one another, the greater the potential for conflict; and the more "diverse" the crowded population the greater the potential for violence. There is a good reason why God confounded Human speech and stopped the building of the "Tower of Babel".

WE DISPARAGE CONSPIRACY THEORISTS; and we certainly do not say that there is a mighty "Vegan Left" conspiracy to take over the planet or even these United States. What we face here is a situation in which a mixed bag of individuals have been inspired - brainwashed in most cases - by two men in history: Karl Marx and Saul Alinsky (who was himself inspired by Marx).

Karl Marx of course was (along with Freiderich Engels) the founder of the political philosophy of communism. In fact, the word "capitalism" is itself a Marxist invention. The linchpin of Marxist philosophy is "from each according to his abilities, to each according to his needs". And we at the Alexandria Daily Poop must agree that ideally that would be just great. Except that there has to be some way of determining what those abilities and needs are. And someone has to do the sorting. After all, if you have twenty individuals whose best ability is the manufacture of lamps trying to meet the needs of fifty blind people, there's a problem. And how often have you said, "I need a vacation!!"? Well, says you. The Marxist authorities might just say otherwise.

AND SO HOW DO YOU DIVERT THE TALENTS OF A LAMPMAKER TO SATISFY THE NEEDS OF A BLIND MAN? The Marxist answer is "re-training". But what if the lampmaker is quite happy to make lamps? Well, this is the reasoning behind the Soviet "GULAG" system. The lampmaker, being resistant to being retrained, must be harshly and expediently re-educated. And if the "re-education" results in his death, it will be an example to his fellows who; if they are at all concerned about their own hides, quickly fall into line and learn to produce canes and seeing-eye dogs. And if a dearth of lamps results from this, the elite rulers can then claim a savings of electricity costs. A win-win situation unless you are eating dog-doo soup in Siberia. That is communism.

"Socialism" is nothing else but the larval stage of communism. But and especially to the young words have exaggerated meaning. "Socialist" and "Liberal" sound much more agreeable and comfortable than "strict" and "conservative". Famously, in their hit song "Chicago" (which was about the "Chicago 7" trials of the 1968 Democrat Convention Protest leadership) the group "Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young ("CSNY" or David Crosby, Steven Stills, Graham Nash, and Neil Young) sang these lyrics:

"Rules and regulations, who needs them?"

Indeed. BUT from the very same then-kids who now run this nation comes the chant for more and more rules and regulations. This, while the chanters disparage "strict constructionalism" in "interpreting the Constitution". We are at a loss. "Strict"= restrictive=bad=evil; While "Liberal"=regulation=need for strict enforcement=restrictive=good??

The popular music group "Tears for Fears" put it succinctly: "Everybody Wants to Rule the World". And there has been no truer statement ever made. And here is where Saul Alinsky comes in.

Saul Alinsky was a goddamned Communist who wrote a book called "Rules for Radicals" (previously mentioned on this web log). Alinsky's proposition was that "power" must be taken from the "Haves" and given to the "have nots". Now this is a splendid example of "circular logic" since what Alinsky meant by "Haves" and "have-nots" is those who have and do not have "power". This absolutely begs for an answer to the question: If those who have power are evil by lief of their posession of power; and those who have not power are good because they do not posess it; then what net good can result from a reversal of the situation? And let us suppose that Alinsky meant not power but material goods? Should the rich keep their material goods but surrender power to the "have-nots"? What else will the "have-nots" use this power for other than to forcibly confiscate the wealth of the "haves"? Thus making them - according to Alinsky - virtuous "have nots" while the erstwhile "have-nots" morph into evil, parasitic "haves".

Actually, "Haves" vs "Have-nots" is a false dichotomy. We have seen in our experience the estate of a very wealthy lawyer - one to whom we were delivering about ten suitcases full of documents for him to work on over the weekend. And the estate was a marvellous thing. An Olympic-size swimming pool and a tennis court, and the house so large we mistook it for a church of some kind. And we realized as we watched this harried individual sign for the buttload of work we had delivered; that he would not be doing any swimming on Saturday. But we would; and perhaps a bit of fishing as well. We suppose we might have the best of both worlds - the freedom to swim and fish plus lots of money to buy better fishing tackle and even overnight accomodations to extend our weekend - if we could forcibly take from that lawyer all of his wealth, leaving him in a truly "have-not" state. But then we would be one of the "haves"; and God forbid he might read a copy of "Rules for Radicals"!

Ideals have their place. And in a perfect Universe there would be plenty of everything for everyone. Indeed we believe in an Almighty God who has unlimited supplies of everything and who can make unlimited quantities of anything, who overflows with everything and more. And furthermore, this same God is the only being in the Universe who is capable of doling out these goodies in any way even approximating Karl Marx's ideal. Yet the followers of Marx deny Him, or worse seek to subjugate His worship to their own selves. The modern Left consists not so much in a "global Communist conspiracy" - although great and small collusions of leftists abound - as in groups of people who have made contributions great and small to a false god -- an idol -- upon which they place their various faiths and bow down to.

What Alinsky meant by "haves and have nots" was and is mainly the American very wealthy and very poor. But by global standards, all but the very poorest one or two percent of Americans are richer than Henry VIII. Here in Alexandria, Virginia we have "Public Housing" containing "the poor" that is well above the standard of living for a middle-class family in, say. Hyderabad, India (where a family of Missionaries of our aquaintance went to teach the locals how to use "Squatty Potties" rather than just poop in the roadside). Only in America does a person who flushes his toilet with drinking water consider himself "underpriveleged"; and yet it is such as these to whom Alinsky ascribed the term "have nots".

And let us not forget that the current "President" Obama has a family member - HIS OWN BROTHER - who lives in poverty in Kenya, in a hut made of mud and sticks; and who subsists on one lousy dollar per month. Yet this same "President" who professes "Hope" for all America and for the world's billions; does not spare from his own - and considerable - wealth a measly double sawbuck to better the existence of his own blood relative. Yet Obama is an apostle of Alinsky.

As are most of the makers and sellers of "organic Artisinal Vegan Tofu". And we have nothing against tofu, we have eaten it and have even had some very tasty vegetarian cuisine; although we dined on such fare not to be morally superior but rather because we enjoyed the taste of it. Still, purporting to champion the "have nots" over the "haves"; quite like championing the gophers over the starving humans; necessarily means placing oneself in a position above them both; which means usurping the very Throne of God Himself.

"Everybody wants to rule the world". To-Phooey.

Friday, October 9, 2009


YES, DEAR READERS, YOU NEED NOT PINCH YOURSELVES, WE AT THE ALEXANDRIA DAILY POOP REALLY DO BELIEVE that the awarding of the Nobel Peace Prize to "President" Barack Hussein Obama mmm mmm MMMM is altogether fitting and appropriate.

WE HAVE DISCOVERED in discussions with various members of the public that there are many victims of the public schools who do not know the background or origins of the prize. And so, a little history first.

ALFRED NOBEL was a Swedish weapons merchant who invented dynamite. Dynamite was one of the very first safe-to-handle high explosive compounds. Basically it was and is nitroglycerin compounded with diatomaceous earth. Such a thing naturally had tremendous implications for warfare, and the 19th Century was quite as infested with leftist peacenicks as the present day. Nobel was condemned as a "Merchant of Death" for his invention. Allegedly out of shame but more likely to shine up his "legacy"; he endowed a prize for outstanding contributions to peace. The endowment, however, was and is funded by the sales of weapons and explosives (Nobel continued to sell the stuff, and Dynamit Nobel is today a fully functional arms manufacturer. They make a humdinger of a rifled shotgun slug round)

BEING THEREFORE FOUNDED ON THE TWIN PILLARS OF IRONY AND HYPOCRISY; And having been born of Leftist scorn; the Nobel Peace Prize is therefore altogether fitting as an award for this "President".

NOW IT IS ALLEGED BY MANY CONSERVATIVE COMMENTATORS that "President" Barack Hussein Obama mmm mmm MMMM has done nothing to deserve this prize. We disagree. Obama has - even from the early days of his campaign - denigrated these United States, and since being elected has continued to do so. He has stated as a goal of his the diminishment of our role as the world's only remaining superpower. He has intimated that he is even willing to prostitute our National interests to the benefit of some of the world's worst tyrannies. And to the snooty Scandanavian leftists who run the Nobel Prize program, this is the road to peace. To them, the greatest goal of anyone seeking peace is to get the United States of America to surrender. "President" Barack Hussein Obama mmm mmm MMMM is the best hope they have ever had. Oh, Obama has done PLENTY to deserve the Nobel.

Monday, October 5, 2009

Conspiracy theorists. Give it a rest. Please.

BE IT THE BIRTHERS OR THE TRUTHERS the tide of "Conspiracy Theory" is at an all time high-water mark. Lately we have seen theories that drug manufacturers are in bed with the Bilderberg whatever and the Rothschild something or other to collude with General Motors and "President" Obama - who is secretly in bed with the Bush family - to take over the globe and enslave us all. Or something like that. Puh-leeze.

WE AT THE ALEXANDRIA DAILY POOP DO NOT DOUBT FOR ONE MINUTE that there are various corrupt corporate and individual entities. And there have been since the beginning of time. And probably by the fourth or fifth generation of modern human beings, groups of people have conspired against other groups and individuals. Oog the flint-chipper might have made common cause with Ogg the arrowhaft maker and Ugg the bowmaker to corner the market on hunting tackle. The weak spot there is the same weak spot that eventually dooms all conspiracies. Oog was looking out for his own self, as were Ogg and Ugg. One fine day a guy named Yagg invented a way of putting feathers on arrowshafts and met another guy named Gagg who had invented a compound bow. Oog the flint-chipper saw that people would love this new superior tackle. He abandoned Ogg and Ugg and threw in with Yagg and Gagg. But since demand exeeded supply, soon Ogg and Ugg were making their own versions of the new tackle. Oog still made the warheads, and hired new people, and even ran into competition as some of his employees tried and in a few cases succeeded in making better designs of arrowheads.

Then along came some guy who found out how to make metal arrowheads, and upset the whole applecart.

"CONSPIRACY" IS A CRIMINAL JUSTICE TERM. TO CONSPIRE IS TO ENTER INTO AN AGREEMENT THAT IS NOT ONLY MUTUALLY BENEFICIAL BUT ALSO - BY DEFINITION - CRIMINAL. You cannot "conspire" to feed the poor, heal the sick, or clothe the naked. Yet simple business arrangements have often been described as "conspiracies" by those who have neither the brains nor the wherewithal to make a similarly advantageous deal for themselves. Walmart making a deal with China to import shoes is not a "conspiracy" to force everyone else out of the shoe biz. It is an arrangement to obtain quality goods for a low price, sell them slightly above cost, and thus permit children to walk shod to school, where they will be taught the evils of doing business the Walmart way. But wait, you say. China uses underpaid workers to make those shoes! So isn't Walmart in a conspiracy with China to promote slave labor?


Walmart is in a conspiracy with Walmart to get the best stuff it can as cheaply as it can and sell it for less than anyone else. Walmart had the same idea everyone else wishes they had gotten first. If Walmart were instead Kennedymart, nobody would be bitching. The whole "Walmart Conspiracy" angle is a steaming crock.

As to true conspiracies, if there are any, their fundamental weakness and the assurance of their eventual downfall is that any conspiracy is founded by two or more entities who (although they share a few common interests) are more than anything else concerned about their own interests. An "altruistic conspiracy" is the very definition of oxymoron. At some point, the effects of the conspiracy will begin to be felt by its victims, who will then begin what will either culminate in violence and/or its equivaent of "government action/reform". The larger and more wide-ranging this conspiracy, the sooner it will reach this stage. A conspiracy between a hundred entities might survive - if very well led and managed - a quarter century, but eventually the various conflicting interests will begin to be unnerved at the attention directed as the public wises up.

Conspiracies can last only so long as the interests of the conspirators do not come into conflict. This - human nature being what it is, and human beings being what conspiracies consist of - is inevitable. Once this conflict is realized, the breaup of the conspiracy is ditto inevitable; and the only way the conspiracy will live on is in the efforts - born out of fear - between the members of the conspiracy to keep it from being uncovered.

We do not here say that conspiracies do not abound. Teenage lovers will conspire to kill interfering parents, contractors and politicians will conspire to manipulate public service projects, currency speculators and businessmen will consspire to maneuver the wealth of entire nations to their own advantage; and it has always been so and will continue until GOD comes to establish His Perfect Justice (and look out!) .

But the bald fact is, the larger the conspiracy the more human beings are involved. And each and every one of them is looking out primarily for his own interests. A conspiracy is a chain which cannot be stronger than its weakest link. The larger the conspiracy, the more links in the chain. And the more links, the greater of a weak one in a fatal position. Two people may conspire to swindle a third person and get away with it. Two dozen people may be successful in swindling a county out of some money if they do not get too greedy (but they inevitably will),

Many more than a dozen, however, and the individual interest of the participants (and the aggregate interest of various factions) will sooner or later lead to a downfall. There may well be conspiracies between well-heeled groups that have lasted for centuries. But these have largely roped out into the above mentioned denial stage. There are indeed large groups of people who have tried to garner absolute control of wealth and power unto themselves. And they will do so - or try - again if they can. But their individual members have succumbed to greed and gotten themsselves arrested and in many cases imprisoned or even executed for crimes great and small. A conspiracy requires closely enforced cooperation for the greater - and criminal - good. But he who enters into a conspiracy does not do so for the interests of the group but rather for his own interests. Conflict is inevitable, and the more participants, the greater and more disastrous the potential for disintegration.

In a like vein, the larger conspiracy alleged by the accuser, the less likely there is that there was a conspiracy in the first place. A conspiracy of two may be built of bricks. A conspiracy of three is a hut of sticks. A conspiracy of four is a shack of straw, and anything more is a fortress - no matter how formidable in appearance- of playing cards, which the merest wind might well take down. Two words: Joe Valachi.

Saturday, October 3, 2009


WE ARE EXTREMELY FRUSTRATED that we allowed advertising on this blog, which is conservative and nationalist and most assuredly NOT supportive of "President" Obama and his enablers. And yet when we have tried to get help, there is no readily apparent way in which to register our objections. Our objection is that the readership of this rag, all three of them, are not about to click on an ad for "canonize Obama" T-shirts or "Single payer healthcare now" bumper stickers. Come on Google. How about some ads for firearms or Ann Coulter's latest book or Mark Levin or something?? THAT is what our readers are interested in. Putting an ad for contributions to some Ubamanista concern is like putting an ad for Zyklon B in the Bnai' Brith newsletter.

PLEASE GOOGLE!! Get us some relevant ads or we will drop out. And our apologies to our readers. We don't get to choose the ads, and we do NOT support the Left.

Friday, October 2, 2009



Now this would not BE a disgrace if Chicago had been turned down after several rounds of voting. And one woulld think that such a couteousy might have been extended to the "Leader of the Free World". But with "President" Obama and his wife standing there, Chicago was the VERY FIRST CITY REJECTED. In diplomatic circles this is what is known as "a kick in the balls".

It is entirely possible that the International Olympic Committee had heard Obama's frequent apologies for America, his frequent denial of the innate greatness of America; and agreed with him. They may have thought they were doing him a favor by giving us the humiliation he has often intimated we deserve.

Or perhaps they thought he was a pompous ass - and he is - deporting himself all over the place as if he thinks he is the King of the World. Perhaps they thought that he had a lot of nerve showing up in Copenhagen and implicitly using the power of the Presidency to twist a few arms. Perhaps they resented him.

Or maybe Michelle Obama's comments about her big "sacrifice" in coming to Copenhagen insulted them. Can you imagine someone coming to America, checking into a luxury hotel where he or she was pampered and every whim catered to, where beautiful sights and history abound, enjoying it all and then sighing that he or she was making a "sacrifice" in coming?? How insulted would we be??

Or maybe the IOC took all three of the foregoing into consideration. But no other conclusion is possible other than that by disqualifying Chicago ON THE FIRST VOTE was a DELIBERATE slap at Obama and by extension to the nation he is "President" of.

Of course the Obama White House and the various "drive by media" have been falling all over themselves trying to explain away this debacle. One of the more ludicrous explanations is that Obama went there for a "secret meeting" with one of his Generals about Afghanistan. But the fact is that Obama really opened himself - and therefore the entire nation - for a thorough dissing by going to Denmark to shill for his hometown - and America - in the first place.

We conclude that if Obama can't keep from putting his own self in a place where he is vulnerable to a kick in the nuts, where does that leave US??? Huh? Take a guess.....

Thursday, October 1, 2009


Well, we certainly hope we got your attention. Actually we are in darn near complete agreement with the author of "Liberty and Tyranny". However we must take issue with a remark he made last night.

Mr. Levin said that if the Founders knew what was taking place today would take place they would never have ratified the Constitution. We disagree, for the following reasons:

WE ARE NOT YET IN THE GRIP OF A TYRANNY. Oh, the wannabe fascists are trying and they seem to have met with some measure of success. We do not say that these are not dangerous times for Liberty. They definitely are. But the Founders could see this possibility, and the Document they crafted provided for just such an emergency. Every two years one third of the Senate and every seat in the House is up for re-election. If this does not dissuade those who would pervert the Constitution from attempting to do so or from passing disastrous legislation, The People are able to remove them before their actions have done too much damage; and put in new people who will reverse course and clean up the mess. Witness the tumult over the present various DemonRat boondoggles, notably the "health care reform" nonsense; and the nervousness of many "centrist" Democrats, whose votes are needed if these disasters are ever to see the desk of "President" Obama.

In order to engender said tumult, the Founders gave us the First Amendment. It is very revealing that the Ratz have put out feelers toward blunting criticism by trying to re-institute the so-called "Fairness Doctrine" and otherwise attempting to muzzle the speech of those who disagree; only to find out that they have picked up a very hot potato indeed. And so We the People are being informed of the parliamentary acrobatics used to thwart our will. As the Ratz use cornier and hokier tricks, they are doing so not in the back room and the cloakroom but under the searing spotlight of modern mass media, of which we and Mr. Levin are part. Freedom of Assembly is also beng put to very effective use with the Tea Party movement, and in the midst of all this, demonstrations that the Second Amendment is alive and well are also being made.

Far from being disgusted with the present spectacle, we believe the Founders would be looking at this and feeling pleased that the Constitution is working as intended. We believe they knew very well that such as the DemonRatz would arise. We believe they knew that, as is happening now, they would slowly move to chip away at the Constitution until they believed they had weakened it enough to mount a massive final assault. And we believe they knew that The People would not long sleep, but once rudely awakened take such measures under the Constitution as to quell the threat to our Sacred Liberty. And this is exactly what is happening. The Founders DID see this coming, and our magnificent Constitution is working exactly as designed.

And the Founders also foresaw Mark Levin and this blog, and we believe that we both are doing them proud. And so are the People, as long as they fight. The Constitution is a massive weapon against tyranny; it is a commission to all citizens to act in defense of Liberty. The Militia has been activated and the Sword of free speech, assembly, and the Vote is in our hands; and also we have the Musket if need be. Only tyrants need tremble before us; and make no mistake, they do.

AND SO, MARK LEVIN; Patriot and warrior for freedom though you are, on this point we must very respectfully disagree.

Saturday, September 26, 2009


WE AT THE ALEXANDRIA DAILY POOP ARE DEFINITELY NOT AMONG THE ADMIRERS OF "PRESIDENT" BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA. However, credit where it is due is imperative; and Obama's calling out of Iran - and importantly his statement that military action is "not off the table" shows that he at least realizes what very hot water looks like.

We are not at all convinced that Obama's concerns are for the United States, however. Obama is as much concerned about his image in Europe - and perhaps a bit more - than he is about his image in these United States. And Europe is terrified at the prospect of a nuclear-armed Iran, and well they should be. It is much easier to hit Paris or Berlin from Iran with a missile than it is the United States. Whatever his motivation, however, Mahmoud Ahmadi-Nejad has thrown down a gauntlet at "President" Obama's feet. And though we view him with - to put it mildly - skepticism - we are pleased that he has responded forcefully enough to state that military action is one of the tools in his kit.

We cannot help but wonder but what being exposed to what being the President of the United States really means might just make this boy wonder into a man. A nuclear-armed Iran might just decide to give nuclear devices to Al-Qaeda, And Al-Qaeda just might decide to explode one in Obama's beloved Chicago. Or, they might decide to blow up Podunk, Idaho. Either way he would be damaged beyond repair, and for that matter so would the DemonRat Party.
But to threaten, however mildly, the possibility of military action by the Commander in Chief of the world's most superior armed force is a profound thing. Consider what Obama said and consider the consequenses of anti-Iranian military action. The possible closing of the Straits of Hormuz, through which so much of the globe's energy passes. Something even nastier than World War Three could result. And into this we elected a jejune moron because people were getting laid off work??

Well he had damned well better wise up fast. We find it admitable that Obama has picked up the gauntlet thrown at his feet. What he does next will affect us all. We may all regret his ascention to the White House. But there is a possibility that in this caase he will do the right thing. We hope so. But we remain extremely skeptical.

Thursday, September 24, 2009


WHAT IN SAM HILL IS UP WITH "PRESIDENT" OBAMA?? He has just addressed the United Nations General Assembly with a speech full of apologies and, as he did during his campaign speech in Berlin, promised to clip America's wings, and this in front of an aaudience containing representatives of the world's worst tyrannies; ghastly regimes whose blood-stained leaders no doubt welcome the promised dimming of the light of Liberty and Freedom which beckons their benighted subjects. Two of those despots, Moammar Qaddaffi and Iran's Ahmadi-Nijad were there in person. But worse was to follow.

NEXT ON THE AGENDA, "President" Obama then chaired a meeting of the U.N. Security Council. He focused on eliminating nuclear weapons from the globe. The Security Council in the end passed a resolution to do just that. We are at a loss as to where to begin our reaction to this singularly stupid ploy, but we will take a shot at it.

We seem to remember aa few lines from Doctor Strangelove; from a speech by "President Merkin Muffley" to wit : "Try as we might, we will never be rid of The Bomb; because the knowledge of how to make it will always be with us" Truer words have never been spoken, and only a fool believes a world free of nuclear weapons will ever be possible (unless of course something even more powerful is invented ). Nations such as Iran and North Korea will simply tell the United Nations to go to hell, as indeed they already have. Obama's proposition is therefore STUPIDITY COMPOUNDED. And do you think, seriously, for one second that China and Russia are going to just surrender their nukes?? If so you are either extremely ignorant or you are a damn fool.

This is reminiscent of our grade-school days during the Cold War, when lots of tykes cutely suggested that instead of wars, nations ought to resolve disputes over a game of soccer or by having their two smartest people play a game of chess. Being rudely disabused of this notion is an important part of growing up. Apparently either our Chief Executive has never grown up OR he thinks we never did and is cynically manipulating us. If human nature were amenable to such solutions, there would never be armed conflict ever. It is, we hope, hardly necessary to elaborate on this point.

Another quote from Doctor Strangelove by the same character: "The behavior of nations has always been despicable. The larger nations have always acted like gangsters and the smaller nations have always acted like prostitutes. They have bribed and threatened and murdered and lied their way through history..." Indeed, and one must consider that nuclear weapons have very likely prevented another conflagration in Europe that catches across the globe as occurred twice in the first half of the last century. They are a powerful deterrent, and the only sure-fire way to stop a nation full of suicidal fanatics. Nuclear weapons are good stuff in the right hands.

AGAINST THE BACKDROP OF THESE MOST SERIOUS MATTERS, What is America talking about endlessly at this writing? McKenzie Phillip's sexual affair WITH HER OWN FATHER and there are a number of people who - if not outrightly approving - are advocting tolerance of intergenrational incest.

God help us. Seriously.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009


WHAT WITH THE RISING DRUMBEAT OF RESISTANCE TO THE CRACK-BRAINED PLANS OF THE DEMONRATZ TO TAKE OVER THE COUNTRY, We here at the Alexandria Daily Poop knew that it would only be a matter of time before the Ubamanistas started playing the "race card". Oh, they have been bluffing it all along, but the VERY successful Washington demonstration has panicked them and they are putting it squarely on the table. But the card is dog-eared, worn and old. It is a tired old trick; but the Ratz are masters at using it.


FIRST, a poster carried by a very few people at a very few of the tea parties was shown. This poster was then described as depicting Obama "dressed as a witch doctor", which we must say did look like the 1930s movie depictions of Congo shamen. But really. To show, oh say, Maxine Waters dressed like that might be vicious. But face it folks. Obama looks like famous white dumbass Barney Fife. Would Barney Fife dressed as a witch doctor be racist?? NO. Nevertheless the media whores made great beating of the breast over this "shameful" portrait.
NEXT, "man in the street" interviews were shown and the "man in the street" was in every case a poor, semi-educated black person who spoke in ghetto grammar as follows (We here depict phonetically what was said. We are not making fun, we are reporting): "AH tinks dis is very disrespec'full ob de office od be pesiden'". We have often wondered why, when playing the "race card" the media looks high and low to find and present black folks who conform to the most cartoonish stereotypes of racist haters, and then presents them as serious people. This is, for lack of a better comparison, as if Jethro Bodine as "Director Beef Jerky" were to present a serious PSA protesting censorship of the movies.
THE ICING ON THE CAKE IN CNN'S COVERAGE came when a minor "Tea Party" organizer was called out on calling Obama the "Racist in Chief". He was confronted by ET looking whatsisname Gergen and unmasked "V" alien looking James Carville, who mocked, scolded and badgered him to scorn. Never mind Obama's many slurs against white folk or his long allaiance with a racist "pastor" in a White-hating "GOD DAMN AMERICA" church.

No, if you oppose Obama there is really only ONE REASON: YOU ARE A RACIST.


WE WILL HERE STATE OUR QUALIFICATIONS TO SPEAK SO BLUNTLY. We were born the son of a 1/4 Cherokee who grew up under the stigma of being the "son of a half-breed". In fact, for the rest of this post we are going to drop the cheeky editorial "WE". I am now speaking as an individual. My family name is NOT "NORMAN" due to ancestry (except maybe very indirectly). What happened as far as I have been able to gather from accounts is that my great-grandmother when she was about 15 and living on the Oklahoma end of the Trail Of Tears fell for a (god I hope he was) handsome young American calvalry officer. And as the old Negro song went, when she wore her apron low he stayed around her door. But then she got pregnant. Well, maybe he did get transferred involuntarily or maybe he just decided that she was not so attractive "when she wore her apron high" and scarce saw him passing by. Thus my grandfather was a bastard, and yall shut the hell up.
Well, Great-Grandmom decided to give her son a name tha might at least give him some respect, so she chose to name him after the White settlement of Norman, OK.
A few wars and a depresssion later, my great-grandmother's grandson met a young girl who was the product of the Irish Baileys and the German Mungels. In January of 1953, I ;popped out of this centuries-old maelstrom. And now I find myself bandied about in a discussion ot the role of race in America????? My Dad flew 26 missions in WWII in a B-24 Liberator, including the deadly Ploesti raid. Wanna know what I think of the whole race bullshit?? I am one-eighth Cherokee, the son of a quarter-bleed who was the son of a half-breed and who lived under a stigma. Oh yes and by the way, there was a regiment of Black soldiers back when who helped pput my ancestors "in their place"

THEY WERE CALLED THE "BUFFALO SOLDIERS" AND THEY HELPED STEAL THIS LAND FROM 1/8 OF MY ANCESTORS. But it's all good, "cause you gave it to the other 7/8ths,,

AND NOW WE WILL RE-ASSUME THE EDITORIAL "WE". And we surmise from all the foregoing that perfect justice would leave everyone starving to death. If you wish to implement and enforce "perfect Justice" well, all we can say is beware. Racism my ass.

Thursday, September 10, 2009


ON TUESDAY, THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL HERE IN ALEXANDRIA, "President" Barack Hussein Obama travelled to Wakefield High School in Arlington County to deliver an "inspirational message" to the Nation's schoolkids. What he appeared to say was that the kids should learn to be responsible and study hard and in fine all the usual stuff that kids need to hear every day from their PARENTS, and for the most part do. It was just the standard lecture in the den, or so it seemed.

BUT IF ONE LISTENED CLOSELY the true meaning of Obama's message became clear. It is obvious that Obama did not mean that students should "take responsibility" for themselves. After all, his proposals - especially health care - show clearly that he believes that none of us are capable of being responsible for ouselves and we all need his help. No, what Obama meant was that the students should prepare themselves for the responsibility of serving the Government!! Quite a difference. There is an old National Socialist propaganda film outlining these kinds of ressponsibilities, and it ends with an entire family gathering outside their picket fence - Mother, Father, Daughter, and Son (dressed of course in his Hitler Jugend uniform) and giving the fascist salute to a passing parade. The voice-over says(translated): "Do your best part for the Nation and then you will be part of the best Nation!"

THAT was the entire gist of Obama's back-to-school speech. The original plan was to have teachers nationwide follow it up with an essay assignment to write about "How can I help President Obama?" That, however, drew howls of protest and was dropped in hopes it would be forgotten. But it will not be.

THEN LAST NIGHT JUST ABOUT 24 HOURS BEFORE THESE WORDS WERE WRITTEN, "President" Obama made a speech about "his" health care plan. A Congressman, One Joe Wilson (R-La) yelled out "YOU LIE!!!" For this he (Wilson) is being roundly criticized by - of course - DemonRatz. We also have some criticism for Wilson; namely that he did not yell "LIAR" loudly enough nor often enough. The entire speech was one big lie.

FIRST AND FOREMOST OBAMA DOES NOT EVEN HAVE A PLAN. He is shilling for two bills, one in each House of Congress, neither of which he has either written or read. To call these two bills "my plan" when he wrote not a word of either is a lie. He is just a salesman and he is - as he did during the campaign last fall- selling a bill of goods. We are not buying any, and neither should you.

We were pleased to learn that a few members of Congress read this collection of our rantings, and so we would like to say to you in particular that is you wish to keep your jobs in November of next year, then you MUST bury this abysmal "reform" bill AND the equally insidious "Cap and trade" nonsense. One thing informs us in our writings better than most polls and that is the fact that; as we operate a taxicab for a living we get people from all over the country and from all walks of life. There is a growing perception in the USA that the Obamanista Demon-Ratz are not "creeping Socialism" but rather "creeping fascism"; and many fear that Obama's goal is to have fascism break into a dead run. If YOU don't stop it, then I guarantee you We the People will replace you in about 14 months with people who will. You have been warned.

Monday, August 31, 2009


AT LONG LAST the Senate of the United States of America is rid of a politician who was an immense threat to the Republic. Senator Edward M. Kennedy died - finally - of brain cancer the other day (we don't care to mark the date).

Although we do indeed sympathize with the immediate family - we have ourselves sustained loss of loved ones recently - Senator Kennedy was, to put it mildly, a detriment to our Constitutional Republic. It is tragic that it took death to dislodge him from the Senate, but it was necessary and America has been thereby blessed.

We are sure that there are those of you who will cry boo-hoo and deride us, citing Kennedy's "pristine intentions" and "dedication to the little guy". Well the intentions were quite noble and so were the goals, but Ted Kennedy proposed (and too often suceeded in) using the force of government to force everyone to give as much as Ted deemed needful to whatever cause he deemed deserving, whether those so robbed agreed or not. Ted was exactly the type of moneyed "rich man" he derided and insisted on taxing to death in the name of the poor; yet he held onto his own riches quite closely.

Ted Kennedy would give a needy man the shirt off our back.

There are many commentators who remark about their fantasies of punishments God will now inflict on Kennedy. For our part we believe that God alone has the authority to judge eternally. We and all of us have ample reason to believe thusly, lest it be us standing before Him. So we shall not speculate here on the present state of Ted Kennedy's soul; and in fact we hope he is safe in the arms of the Lord. Those who wish eternal torment in Hell upon someone, no matter how evil, do so because they do not know what exactly that entails. If anyone were able to experience a sample of it, they would never again say, "go to Hell" to another human being ever again. To those who feel this way we reccommend they look into every instance where God has shown Himself to man in the Bible. The very realization of the viewer's own unworthiness would prove fatal. The best among us has no more standing on his own merits with God than the worst among us; and we all are infected with the same eternally fatal disease. Without forgiveness from God, Mother Teresa and Adolf Hitler would share one fate. It is not here we write of Ted Kennedy's final judgment.

HOWEVER we DO judge Ted Kennedy's effect and influence on this Republic. Long story short: Ted Kennedy is dead. May God continue to bless these United States.

Saturday, August 15, 2009


WE ARE RATHER TIRED of seeing various postings and hearing parvenue personages declaring that there are parallels between "President" Obama and Adolf Hitler. OH, we admit there are a few similarities, but there is a BIG difference, and we do not here speak of race. Adolf Hitler worked his way up the ranks of Germany's Socialist Worker's Party until he became the leader and renamed it "National Socialist German Worker's Party" (NAzionalSoZIalistiche Deutches Arbeiter Partei ). From there he consolidated Party leadership and craftily took over the government by increments until he managed to get an "enabling Act" making him absolute Dictator. He was a gifted and inspiring public speaker who gave life to the inner thoughts and resentments of the German people. He identified the majority, villified the minority, and led a rubber-stamp Parliament (the Riechstag). Through it all he, Hitler, was the undisputedcd tip-top cat, and to cross him was to risk death.

ON THE OTHER HAND here we have this Obama. Obama was nothing but a "community Organizer" in Chicago before he was noticed by the Party he serves. He got where he was then and is now by kissing the asses of the party bosses and delivering the votes of the quick and the dead to the Daley machine. The Democrats showed "Appreiciate" by giving him a back-bench in the State Senate. He cast every vote at his party's call, and whenever it fell to him to think for himself at all, he voted "present". Evidently he thought so little they rewarded he by sending him to the Senate in big ol' D.C.

We apologize to Gibert and Sullivan for our lame references. However, at that point he began to be groomed for the 2008 Presidential elections, and the Obama brand was rolled out at the 2004 Democrat Convention. The extreme Left leadership of the Democrat Party did not, do not, and never did envision him as a 'Fuehrer" but rather as an attractive candidate who would be a bill-signing nincompoop and a spokesman for their vision for the country. The DemonRatz are NOT about to give Obama the dicatorial powers they covet for themselves. We do not say that Obama is not a dangerous entity. He is, but he is also a loon and a butt-boy for those who handle him. He did not write "cap-and=trade"; he merely promotes it and (if it gets to him) will sign it like an obedient servant of his white Massas. And the same goes for this health-care boondoggle.

Adolf Hitler would NEVER have let the likes of Nancy Pelosi or Harry Reid set the agenda. HE would have written the legislation HIMSELF and told them to pass it OR ELSE. Pelosi and Reid hold the leash and grind the organ as they send Obama out to dog-and-pony phony "town halls" to hold out his cap for support. Obama is a worse insult to Black Americans than "Amos "N Andy " ever was. To compare him to Hitler is an insult to Hitler.

But that's okay, we suppose; because Hitler can't be insulted too much.

Friday, August 14, 2009


EVER SINCE THE DAYS OF THE FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT ADMINISTRATION, politicians with a taste for Statism have used three sections of the Constitution to justify the restrictions they put upon We The People. We were of course not present at the forging and signing of Our National Charter, however we are very certain that the Framers did NOT intend these passages to be used as loopholes large enough to steer an aircraft carrier through.

These passages are the PREAMBLE; and the "INTERSTATE COMMERCE CLAUSE" and the "NECESSARY AND PROPER" CLAUSE" contained in Article One Section Eight of the Constitution.

FIRST. STOP QUOTING THE PREAMBLE AS JUSTIFICATION FOR ANYTHING. It is an introductory statement outlining the goals the Constitution and the Federal Government are established to attain. That the Preamble says for instance that one goal is to "Promote the General Welfare" DOES NOT GIVE CARTE BLANCHE TO DOLE OUT MONEY TO EVERY DEADBEAT ON EVERY STREETCORNER. Indeed, that is NOT the meaning of "general welfare" at all. That has more to do with ensuring that we live in a decent country and are free and nothing to do with giving some sad-sack a check every month to buy booze with and food stamps to buy Vienna wieners with. "To insure domestic Tranquility" is also not a blank check to for instance establish a police state so that there are no riots. And there is also something to the fact that the word "INsure" rather than "ENsure" was used. Our Founders were educated men, who knew what a word meant.

The Preamble has NO bearing on whether a certain act of government is in compliance with the Constitution. The Constitution's binding legal authority begins directly below the words "Constitution for the United States of America".

SECOND; "TO MAKE ALL LAWS WHICH SHALL BE NECESSARY AND PROPER" is also cut-and-pasted by those who wish to justify whatever lunatic schemes the politiciand might want to push across. But as the REST OF THE CLAUSE MAKES CLEAR, "Necessary and proper" means to carry out the AUTHORIZED POWERS. For instance, you cannot decide that since (A) is needed - and therefore necessary - that it is "proper" to pass a law requiring it. At a MINIMUM, SOMETHING in the Constitution must put (A) within your purview, specifically. It doesnt matter WHAT you think. If it is not authorized, then it is not necessary nor is it proper. PERIOD.

THIRD; THE "INTERSTATE COMMERCE CLAUSE" IS THE MOST ABUSED CLAUSE IN THE ENTIRE CONSTITUTION. The classic example of this is Millard V Filburn, wherein a farmer was arrested and fined for growing wheat beyond his quota for the purpose of feeding his own family. The justification for this was that since farmer Filburn made his own flour rather than buy bread in "Interstate Commerce", then he was "affecting" "Interstate Commerce" and thus the Federal Government was authorized to fine him for growing more wheat than some official thought proper. This was upheld by the Supreme Court, which was full of shit; but ever since that decision the Federal Government has claimed jurisdiction forever over anything which has at some point in time "Moved in Interstate Commerce". This means for example that the Congress assumes that if paper and ink moved from one state to another, then what is done with that paper and ink may fall under Federal control. In fact, abuse of the ICC is the foundation of the lion's share of all the Statist legislaation that has been passed or proposed since the Great Depression.

WHEN ACTOR/COMEDIAN/ENTERTAINER W. C. FIELDS, AN ATHEIST, WAS ON HIS DEATHBED, his nephew walked in on him as he was poring over a Bible. Asked why such a crusty old non-believer was perusing the Holy Book, W.C. responded: "Looking for loopholes, my boy! Looking for loopholes!" A modestly funny story, to be sure; but that is the way too damned many politicians view the Constitution. And it has to stop.

Thursday, August 13, 2009


WHAT TOO MANY PATRIOTS DO NOT REALIZE ABOUT "PRESIDENT" BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA is that he is not the main threat to our liberty. Obama is the butt-boy of the DemonRat leadership. He was picked and groomed by the enemies of liberty as a spokesman for the brand years before he was elected. Obama was intended by th Ratz to be a shill, a spokesman, and an endorser for the vision of the Pelosi/Reid wing of the Democrat party. He is nothing more than an instrument for those who would change us from a Republic of free people to an aristocracy of elite Statists. "People of Color" have been hoodwinked into believing that one of their own now runs the country, when in fact he has been called to the "big house" to pack the c otton for ol' Massa.

The DemonRatz know full well that control of the Congress is MUCH more importnt than control of the White House. This is why they tried to ram everything they c ould through before the Reps and Senators went back home to face their constituents. And the effort will only be redoubled because the way things are going they will lose big time in November of next year.

Obama has deluded himself into thinking he got where he is by his own merits. He did not. He is a tool of those who would

Monday, August 10, 2009


HERE WE ARE IN AUGUST IN THE NATIONAL CAPITAL REGION, and it is as every year hot in the morning, hot as hell at noon, and hot and dark at night. But why is THIS August different from all other Augusts??

Mainly because in August the politicians and their staff pack up, go to hell home, and shut the hell up; and for the rest of the month the Republic is safe from the Congress. But not this year. No, this year the politicking goes on even though the politicians are out of town. The "President" and his henchpeople led by Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi are hell-bent on cramming socialism and taxes down our throats, and we are giving our reps and Senators an earful, loudly. The Lefties are "outraged" at our "assault on Democracy"; and never mind that when it was a bunch of gays "discussing" some aspect of homosexual rights, or NARAL types decrying some effort to limit some of the more barbaric practices of the abortionists; or if some Conservative speaker they did not agree with appeared at a college; the Lefties did not mind the shouting and screaming of their people one bit, in fact they claimed that far from assaulting Democracy, their side was exercising "free speech".

Obama is asking people to turn in their neighbors - and they want names, addresses, birthdates, employment, everything - who oppose "Obamacare". He has personally told the Union thugs to go out and quell the protests; and in one instance an elderly Black conservative was roughed up for selling conservative buttons and stickers at one of these "town halls". In response there is debate in the firearms community about whether to arm ourselves at these rallies for self-defense against gangs of bat-and-cane wielding goons.

WHAT IS IT, WE WONDER, ABOUT AUGUST? World War I broke out in August, and it was in mid-August that the Molotov-Ribbentrop "Non-Aggression Pact" was signed, leading directly to the onset of World War II with the invasion and division of Poland on September 1 1939. Now it is August 2009, 70 years since the Molotov-Ribbentrop pact and the beginning of a global holocaust; and the United States of America are boiling. What will come of this?

Hot August, indeed.

Sunday, August 9, 2009


THIS WEEK MARKS THE 40TH ANNIVERSARY OF THE MUSIC-DRUGS-AND-SEX-IN-THE-MUD-NEXT-TO SOMEBODY-TAKING-A CRAP FEST COMMONLY REFERRED TO AS "WOODSTOCK". What twaddle. We are part of the so-called "Baby Boom" that produced this damn-near disaster. What is being heralded by so many news specials, etc; as "the wonder of 1969" was simply an exhibition en masse of the experience of most of us from that era individually; ie: it is a damn miracle we are around to tell of it.

But never mind, these news specials are replete with old hippies who evidently never bothered to become adults talking about how "everybody helped each other" and how there was like, wow, no racism and stuff. More about that later.

There was on "Dateline" some dude who spoke of staying at a motel outside the concert site and "kissed a man in front of (his) parents" at age 16. We do not know about you, dear reader. But if we had done the same in front of our parents, we would have been sent to a shrink and our father would have sent the man to the MORGUE. Maybe there were miracles at Woodstock after all.

AS TO THE LACK of racism and other culture clash, the reason is as clear as beer piss to anyone who has ever seen pictures or newsreels of the event. The crowd was as homogenous as the 1934 Nuremberg Nazi Party rally. Trying to find a black face in that crowd is like playing a Level 10 game of "Where's Waldo?" It is sort of hard to be a racist when there isn't anyone who isn't your race around to be racist to. I guess the fact that the whole crowd did not leave when Sly and the Family Stone took the stage means nobody was racist?

There might have been Indians - or "native Americans" as the saying goes; although as a 1/8 Cherokee we will be happy to call you a native American if you were born here - but most of them were white boys with feathers in their hair who dollars-to-donuts wouldn't know a tepee from a wigwam.

The whole thing was one helluva mess. We are today astounded by one thing and one thing only: That there were just too many of us kids to deal with back then. Half a million of us at Woodstock and that was less than one third of one percent of us. No wonder our parents, the "Greatest Generation", had a shit hemmorhage at the spectacle. They had literally fucked themselves out of a culture.

The very next year, of course, there were various attempts to re-create Woodstock. This was sort of like bringing in giant fans to re-create a tornado everone miraculously survived, but nevermind, we were kids and we were (and to some extent remain) nitwits. Our personal experience was called "Wrightstock" (on the grounds of Wright State University outside of Dayton, Ohio); where they all but put up neon signs as to where to "sneak in" and if memory serves even hosed down a few acres of dirt to make a mud wallow. Lame? In retrospect, yes.

THEN CAME THE ROLLING STONES CONCERT AT ALTAMONT, CALIFORNIA where there was a truly diverse crowd. And there was bloodshed.

But here we are, 40 years later; and judging from the fawning "news" (40 year old "news"?) coverage some of us have gotten much older but not a helluva lot wiser. Sic Transit Gloria, and maybe that's a good thing.

Friday, August 7, 2009


CELEBRITY DEATH UPDATE : NOTED PITCHMAN BILLY MAYS, whose hyper-energetic ads for detergents and cleaning aids blew the eardrums out of a generation of television viewers; was said today by the LA Medical Examiner's Office to have died due to complications of cocaine use.

You must be shittin' us. Really? You mean that a guy who got hyper-excited about damned near everything he spoke of and was always, always equipped with a huge grin as he jumped about shouting the virtues of soap was on drugs?? For real?

My. Aren't we surprised. (we're not).

Thursday, August 6, 2009


Yes, we know. This is the ALEXANDRIA Daily Poop, yet we seem to have posted very little if anything specifically about the City of Alexandria. We must, and promise to, remedy this; starting with today's posting.

Let's talk about our Congressional Representative, the embarrassing James Moran.

This idiot is about as Virginian as Boston Baked Beans. He has repeatedly insulted Jews, has been accused of smacking women around, and on one occasion roughed up a pre-pubescent African-American kid because he thought he might be fooling around with his vehicle. Get a skinful of boozze in this bozo and look out, we mean he is from all accounts a pretty mean drunk. In our opinion Congressman "Bugs" Moran is not a nice person. And if he were a Republican (or even a conservative) the DemonRatz would be hollering for his head.

But it's all good, you see; because Bugs is a liberal DemonRat. He expressed last year outrage and astonishment that people thought they were "entitled to keep their wealth" (People other than him, that is ). Which is why when we inherited a tidy sum from our father we quickly put it where he and Ubama will not be easily able to get their hooks on it. Moran in addition to being what he is personally is a money-confiscating gun-grabbing tax-and-spend neo-socialist liberal-schmiberal loon of the first water, which makes him a fine fit for this city full of liberal weenies.

But our fair city may be turning around. In the last City Council election many of the most egregious socialist libs were thrown out, and two conservatives - one Republican and the other Republican leaning - were put in. Justin Wilson, one of those intolerable young socialist knowitalls who got elected by a wide margin last time was tossed out on his ass. He made a concessionary announcement that was nothing but standard liberal twaddle regurgitated.

Oh, there is hope. You bet there is. Change is in the air, and it's not what the Ubamanistas were hoping for.

Wednesday, August 5, 2009



Really? This is the technique that the Geheime Staatspolizei - commonly known as the Gestapo - used to terrorize the political opponents of National Socialism. We at the Alexandria Daily Poop are accordingly terrorized. OOOOOOH we is SO FWIGHTENED we promise not to say nothing bad bout de pessiden' jes' pleeze doan repo't us pleeze.

Actually we hope we get reprted several thousand times. We hope we are visited by Government agents telling us to cease and desist. Because we will tell them to go FUCK THEMSELVES. Here at the Alexandria Daily Poop, we will say WHATEVER THE FUCK WE GODDAMNED WELL PLEASE and we DARE anyone to try and stop us.

We are NOT "astroturf" we are true grassroots and Obama and his thugs know it. The mobs who shout down the Obama apologists are not rent-a-mobs, they are people who are pissed off big time that these DemonRatz seem about to take their votes for granted and vote for this socialist attempt at taking over not just the economy but also their very lives.

There is much more to be said about all this, but right now we must go and turn ourselves in to the Gestapo. And tell them, as should you, to go fuck themselves. Sideways

Tuesday, August 4, 2009


  • HERE AT THE ALEXANDRIA DAILY POOP, we are assuredly not fans of "President" Obama and his liberal left Demon-Rat cronies. We believe we have established more than sufficient "cred" on this issue. And we woulld like nothing more than to see him forced from office. But.

The noisome crowd of Obama opponents known as the "Birthers" - those who seek to prove that Barack Hussein Obama is not a natural-born American Citizen as required by the Constitution - keeps beating the drum. To you "birthers" we say, stop it. You are making the serious opposition look silly.

We at the Alexandria Daily Poop have examined the birth certification proffered by the "fact checker" and it appears genuine. More over, our own birth certificate contains the same information as does Obama's. Also extant are old newspaper clippings announcing the birth of Obama in Honolulu.

We were astounded today to read noted African-American leftist racial agitator columist Eugene I. Robinson in today's Washington Post; writing about this very subject; and finding ourselves in near-complete agreeement with him on this issue. There is in fact more than sufficient corroborating evidence to put the natural-born citizenship issue to rest.

SO SHUT UP. Yesterday and last night, while crowds enraged at Obama's attempt to force everyone into socialized medicine were jeering Democrat apologists off the stage, on the left-wing tak shows all the talkers were talking about YOU PEOPLE and your silly birther blatherings.

Lest any of you lefties take comfort in this posting, I would point out that such outlandish paranoid ranting by the 9-11 "truthers" was met by you with silence. Pardon. Your hypocrisy is showing.

Sunday, July 26, 2009


HERE AT THE ALEXANDRIA DAILY POOP, We like to think of ourselves a the law-abiding sort of people. We only wish the present Congress and Executive were so obedient. Instead these folks look at the Constitution in the way an "atheist" lawyer leafs through the Holy Bible on his deathbed: always "looking for loopholes".
We could name many instances of this, but by far the one that most jeopardizes the Liberty enjoyed by the Citizens of These United States is the boondoggle-in-the-making known as "Obamacare". Nobody - least of all "President" Obama (judging from the argle-bargle he spouts during his public remarks on the issue) - knows exactly what "Obamacare" will consist of. It is currently three separate bills in two houses of Congress that not one person has read in their entirety. However ALL of them have as their centerpiece an "individual mandate" to buy health insurance .....OR ELSE.

Well. We suppose that is ONE way of making sure everyone is covered. Simply put out a Royal Decree that Ye Shall Be Insured. Sort of like a decree that starving is now illegal as everyone is required to buy and eat cake. The problem is, we fought a Revolution to do away with this sort of thing, and much blood has been spilled to maintain it. And to our way of thinking, the most heinous aspect of this patently un-Constitutional mandate is that it will be administered by that American version of the Geheime Staatspoliezie, the Internal Revenue Service.
That's right. If this abomination (Obamination? yes, we think - nay, we SAY so ) passes, you will recieve a 1040 (or variant) with a new box that will say approximately:


This is wholly unacceptable.

We want to be VERY CLEAR on this issue. EVERY EFFORT must be made by EVERYONE to inform this Administration and the Congress that We the People will not STAND for this interference in our lives and this grab for our fortunes. This unspeakable transgression must be stopped dead and a stake driven through its heart.

BUT if it does pass and is signed into law, we at the Alexandria Daily Poop URGE every Patriot to write "KISS MY ASS" over the demand for provider information; and "COME AND TAKE IT! in the box where you enter the penalty. This if taken will be a step too far. Let us hope it does not come to this, but if it does, then we will soon find out who are MEN and who are SHEEP.


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