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Sunday, December 31, 2017

THE ALEXANDRIA DAILY POOP'S ANNUAL REVIEW OF 2017, PREDICTIONS FOR 2018 AND IDIOT OF THE YEAR FOR 2017

2017 was the year in which we finally regained a real patriot in the White House in the form of President Donald John Trump.  He inherited a tough nut to crack but immediately set about undoing the idiotic legacy which the previous occupant of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue Northwest had been allowed to accumulate during the 8 years of his residency. 

It has not been easy for President Trump, as there exists a group known as "The Washington Establishment"; a group consisting of both Democrats and Republicans who consider themselves members of an elite "club" who consider themselves alone qualified to lead this nation. This little cabal of morons have ceaselessly worked to block and obstruct Mr. Trump.  Trump, however, is (like Ronald Reagan) a former Democrat and he has read the playbook. As a result, nothing they have done has worked.  Trump just does not respond according to the script the Establishment has written.  He's a New York real estate developer. He's dealt with thugs for years.  

And thugs his opposition have been.  From Day One, almost before he was sworn in there has been a steady drumbeat of talk about impeachment over first some alleged "collusion" with Russia and a "hack" of our vote-counting system and then allegations that he sexually assaulted women. In order to facilitate this, the Establishment Democrats threw many of their own - including notorious philanderer Bill Clinton and his enabling spouse - "under the bus".  

But since it was revealed that a member of the Special Prosecutor's team (appointed to investigate "Russiagate" but having failed at that now investigating anything which might lead to something (anything) which might lead to Trump's impeachment) had been an anti-Trump partisan and a Hillary supporter (and who remains so) had spoken of running exactly such a partisan "investigation" as an "insurance policy" in case Trump won;  coupled with the fact that the entire Special Prosecutor's task force is comprised entirely of anti-Trump pro-Hillary partisans, We the People are hollering for SC Mueller's scalp. Lamestream drive-by media outlets have been for weeks breathlessly saying that Mr. Trump "denies planning to fire" Special Counsel Mueller.  The implication is of course that Trump in reality is waiting for the right time to do so. 

President Trump of course knows that he need not do anything but let the corrupt nature of this blatant attempt to unseat him be made manifest to the public.  Eventually the investigation will have to turn toward Hillary and Obama and the corrupt uranium deals and Obama's greasing the skids on the Iranian Nuclear "Agreement" by going easy on Hezbollah when we could have cut the terror group off at the knees. Somebody is going to prison over that, and it won't be a Republican. Obama may just end up to be the first former occupant of the White House to end up breaking rocks in the yard at Leavenworth. 

2017 was the first full year of the Second American Civil War.  This is not a quasi-orderly war as was the first civil war; with States forming alliances against other States.  This war is being fought not as the first one was fought in the Shenandoah Valley, with massed troop formations and cavalry charges. It is being fought as the first one was fought on the Kansas-Missouri border, with random violence such as the Leftist nutbar who shot up a baseball field in Alexandria, VA and damned near killed House Majority Whip Steve Scalise in an effort by the shooter to kill as many Republican lawmakers as possible.  Groups like the "Alt Right" slug it out with other mobs like BLM and "Antifa".  This is likely to get worse before it gets better. 

In the face of these challenges, President Trump has managed to tear down much of the regulatory tyranny imposed by his predecessor. In the tax bill signed just before Christmas, Mr. Trump eliminated the hated "Individual Mandate" which dictated to Americans just how much health insurance they MUST buy and in what form and from whom. 

The reason the Left hates President Trump is because his ascendancy to the White House signals the death knell of the 100 year effort of the fascist Left to reduce the citizenry under absolute despotism.  Just when the election of Hillary Clinton would have likely clinched the total control of America and her people for at least another century, Trump came along and kicked over their applecart.  

GOOD.

President Trump has come along to protect this country and our Constitution just in time. Praise God for President Trump.  

AND NOW, THE EVENT YOU HAVE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR; THE ANNOUNCEMENT OF THE ALEXANDRIA DAILY POOP'S SELECTION OF 2017'S 

IDIOT 
OF
THE 
YEAR
2017! 


Most years since we began this custom, the first nominees (who are chosen monthly, then quarterly, then semi-annually and eliminated in the December Finals).  This year however we found ourselves in a quandry. The two finalists were so exquisitely qualified as idiots that we had a hard time making up our mind.

For newcomers, the rules (which may be waived by us at any time) are:

1. The IDIOT OF THE YEAR is not chosen from among nationally famous people doing nationally recognized idiotic things. The "winner" is chosen from among people I have had contact with in the course of my profession of cab-driving.  The nominee can be a passenger, a mechanic who worked on my vehicle, a store clerk who sold me a part.  Except in very unusual cases the nominee cannot be a bad driver I have encountered. Those are as common a dog poop. 

2. The nominee must have done, said or bragged about something - an act, a line of reasoning, a philosophy, an attitude, etc. - which displays a degree of idiocy grossly incommensurate with the nominee's education or station in life. The guy who (years before we started this award) called us to unlock his car door and who paid us and signed a civil release in advance; and wanted his money back when we reached inside his open window and retrieved his keys (and called the police when we refused to return the money) is one example. He was a high-powered trial lawyer who, upon reaching his house and realizing he could not get in because he did not have his keys flip-phoned the cab company and sat on his porch waiting. 

3. The nominee CANNOT be "mentally challenged".  The idiocy displayed must be the nominee's fault. 

4. The nominee CANNOT be intoxicated when I have the encounter. In the competition for "Idiot of the Year"  intoxicating substances and alcohol are "performance enhancing drugs" and are outlawed. Boasting while sober about an act done when the nominee was intoxicated however is qualifying. 

This year's choice was difficult, mainly because the finalist nominees displayed idiocy from opposite ends of the spectrum.

Finalist #1 is a young lady who told us she couldn't wait for the much-vaunted "driverless car" to come into common use because "I hate to have to think about what I'm doing".  Yes, this college-educated dumbass actually said that.  

Finalist#2 is an older woman who said she would eliminate the criminal justice system and process because they "don't work". This nitwit said she believes that the solution is to immediately set up a government agency to monitor parenting and "step in" when necessary.  

And so our choice is between a youngster who wishes to remain voluntarily clueless and ignorant and an older battleaxe who thinks she is smart enough to rid the world of crime by forcing people to raise kids by government diktat. 

In the end it wasn't really all that hard. Part of the premise of this award is that we don't as a rule name nationally known people but rather the Common American Dumbass, since it is the idiocy of the common idiot which enables the idiocy perpetrated by the major idiots.  We also don't usually name names.  These people know who they are.  

And so, Ms. I-don't-want-to-think, YOU are the recipient of the Alexandria Daily Poop's IDIOT OF THE YEAR award for 2017!

Young lady, we are starting to wonder if all you millennials are complete idiots. Your co-finalist's views on crime prevention by childhood government intervention are appalling. But her ilk will soon take over our lives unless you and others like you start doing some very real and intense thinking about what you are doing and what is going on.  At a minimum get your Fallopian tubes tied so you don't pass your DNA on to another bunch of imbeciles.  You, madame, are a fucking goddamned IDIOT.

PREDICTIONS FOR 2918 

Things will get off to a rousing start as the stock market experiences a correction and drops 5,000 points to 20,000. Never mind that that's still MUCH higher than it ever was under Obama and not really even that much proportionate to the 25,000 it is at as of this writing; the anti-Trump left will milk it to the max.  

The Left will need to milk it to distract attention from the Special Counsel's investigation which will start to turn aggressively toward the Clintons, which is why Trump didn't fire Mueller in the first place. Mueller has been digging a dandy grave, and it's just about the right size for the Democrat Party. 

Just as the Dems are at full throttle about the "stock market crash" the Dow will come roaring back as investors rush to buy the newly less-expensive stocks.  By July Hillary Clinton and several FBI officials will be under Federal indictment and the Arkansas Attorney General will be examining re-opening the Juanita Broderick rape case against Bill Clinton. 

Korean fat butt dictator and international pain in the ass Kim Jong Un will be deposed come August in a coup d'etat by the Nork military sponsored by China. China will be motivated by Trump's threat to pay off our debt by having the Treasury just squirt out a billion more dollars. 

"The Wall" will be built, with construction starting in October. In places it will not be a wall per se, but rather a trench with multiple layers of razor wire on each side and explosives in the earth below to cause tunnels to collapse. The Border Patrol will be given much more latitude including an expanded permission to use lethal force. 

In September Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg will either die or be forced into retirement due to frail health.  Trump will then appoint the fifth guaranteed conservative Justice; ensuring that his revolution will last for another 50 years. 

In November the Republicans will pick up every open seat in the Senate and in the House will fail to pick up only the seats from New York and Minnesota and those held by the poltroons who call themselves the "Congressional Black Caucus".  

It's gonna be a GREAT year, at least it will be if you are not an American Statist Progressive (ASP).  If you are, then planes leave here daily. Get the fuck on one and don't come back.  Happy New Year, you maggots.  You lost.






Sunday, December 24, 2017

CHRISTMAS 2017

This night is Christmas Eve, and kids all across the region are watching "The Grinch" and trying to get sleepy so Santa will come. A couple of friends of mine are recently separated, but they will be spending this blessed evening together with the kids; and we hope the occasion will give them some needed hope. 

But as we sing about the "Little Town of Bethlehem" where the Savior was born, what everyone is talking about is the Israeli City of Jerusalem where He died and was resurrected. Just last week, President Trump finally recognized what everyone knows but have been averse to acknowledge: JERUSALEM IS THE NATIONAL CAPITAL OF ISRAEL.  

This is an important event in the ministry of our Savior whose birth we celebrate tonight and tomorrow. This was prophesied both in the Old Testament and by Jesus Himself. The fig tree is in full leaf now; and the fruit (His Second Coming) is very near to come. 

We wonder sometimes if His mother Mary knew that "This child that you delivered would soon deliver you". And did the Magi know that the gifts they brought to The Manger were besides the gold spices used for embalming a corpse? 

Actually Jesus was born sometime in mid-spring. The shepherds would not be standing around with their flocks in the middle of a December night, the flocks would have been indoors and so would the shepherds have been. But it is so appropriate to celebrate His birth on a day after the darkness began to give way to the light. In so doing we Christians celebrate not only His birth but also His mission. 

And so God rest you merry on this blessed and holy day.

Tuesday, December 19, 2017

BITCOIN, SCHMITCOIN.

Gracious me, we certainly have been hearing quite a bit about the so-called "cryptocurrency" called "Bitcoin" lately, haven't we? We were lured into subscribing to a new E-mag called "AMERICAN CONSEQUENSES" mostly on the strength of one of the founders of the publication being P.J. O'Rourke; who is an American satirist who has had great influence on us. 

Alas. we have only received two issues of the complete magazine.  P.J.'s articles have displayed all of the unique qualities of the Irish-American satirist he is famous for. But then he began sending "special bulletins" urging us to look into the "Cryptocurrency" called "Bitcoin".  Now lately I have been getting "bulletin" after "bulletin" from AMERICAN CONSEQUENSES concerning the advisability of "investing" in "Bitcoin".

So what exactly is "Bitcoin"?

Good fucking question. 

From what I know, sometime back in the early 2000s some guy who called himself Imaso Fulloshita (or something) came up with the idea of creating a unique series of ones and zeroes in sequence and called it a "bitcoin"  Only so many "bitcoins" are in existence, many or most of them trapped in virtual "veins" that can be "mined" by anyone who has 7 or 8 Cray supercomputers linked together and enough money to pay for a day or two's output of the electricity produced by the Hoover Dam to run them. 

Or, you can buy "Bitcoins" if you have the multiple tens of thousands of dollars they are touted as being worth. The means of doing so is complex and your purchase is stored in a "virtual wallet" protected by a "secure password" which, if lost or forgotten means you lose everything. And, let's not even mention, "Secure Password" is increasingly an oxymoron. 

As to making transactions in "Bitcoin", these are recorded in a public ledger called a "Blockchain", whatever the fuck that is. And it's supposedly secure because blah, blah blah arglebargle flap doodle horsecrap. Naturally whole businesses such as :PayPal and others have adopted mechanisms for accepting this "crypto" (ie: private fiat) currency as payment. 

The whole thing seems to me as an overly-complicated way to store and transmit value based on an imagined product that somebody will soon be able to counterfeit using a simple device such as the laptop computer I have been writing this on. 

On the other hand, CASH, the medium that I prefer for all transactions that can be made in person, can be made as secure as "Bitcoin" by lief of modern devices such as holigraphy and microprinting. Wanna steal my cash? look at the masthead of this blog. See that weapon? 

I admit that I don't understand the ins and outs of the Federal Reserve System. But I do understand that if something costs two bucks and I have five bucks in my wallet, then if I get that thing I will have three bucks left, with which I can buy a gallon of gasoline with change left over; and not have to check three or four web sites to find this out. 

Rule one of money: KEEP IT SHORT AND SIMPLE. I have never had cash declined. I have never had anyone tell me they didn't understand why their cash was worthless because they put cash into it that afternoon. I have never been scammed by someone swiping their "credicks card" and then pressing "Print receipt" twice,leading me to believe I had had my device accept a payment.  

In fine, the possibilities of scams and fraud existing already in the "plastic economy" being currently foisted upon us are compounded in the world of Bitcoin. Fuck cards and "crypto currencies" PAY IN CASH. It's easier to understand.

Friday, December 15, 2017

THE WORST WASTE OF MONEY CHRISTMAS GIFT EVER

What costs nearly $2,000, gets you nowhere, takes up too much space and nobody uses? 

For our money it's the "Peloton" stationary exercise bike with an attached TV screen and either canned or live sessions with "New York's best instructors and thousands of others riding with you" in a virtual "training session".   

WHO NEEDS A BIKE THAT GOES NOWHERE AND A DAMNED COACH EXHORTING YOU TO RIDE? 

Us, we have a Fuji 21 speed hybrid mountain bike in excellent condition that we got for two hundred bucks in a pawnshop years ago. On our days off we ride it to the store or down into Old Town Alexandria or maybe on the trail to Mt Vernon. Thus we are not a big old fat-butt garbage gut cab driver. 

We also don't run like a hamster on a wheel, which is about what riding a hyper-priced stationary bicycle is. We believe in integrating exercise into our day-to-day routine.  If we are going to be exerting ourselves, it's best we be doing something useful and/or fun while we do it. 

So please DON'T get us a "Peloton".  Give us the money instead, and we'll ride to wherever we plan to spend it. A Peloton will go straight to the pawn shop.  Thank you.

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

CORRUPT DEMOCRAT SLEDGEHAMMER SLAMS ALABAMA SPECIAL ELECTION


As we write this, various political commentators are (and have been all day) picking apart the election held yesterday in Alabama to fill the Senate seat opened by the departure of Alabama Senator Jeff Sessions as he took the post of United States Attorney General.  Republican Roy Moore lost to his opponent Democrat Doug Jones by a razor thin margin. Moore has not conceded and states that he will request a recount.


The Republican primary for this election was won by Judge Roy Moore.  With a Republican poised to give Republicans 52 seats in the Senate, the Democrat smear machine kicked into overdrive. within weeks it was found that Moore in his 30s apparently had a taste for romancing teenagers who were older than Alabama's legal "age of consent" of 16.  Then and under dubious circumstances a woman was found who claimed she had been "sexually assaulted" by Moore when she was 14 years of age. Although the criminal and civil statutes of limitation have since expired, such an act would have been considered a serious felony under Alabama law.

All hell broke loose.

We will not here recount every last detail of this story as we are sure it has been discussed to death. But it has been our position here at the Alexandria Daily Poop that since there had been no outcry for 40 years until Moore looked poised to take a seat in the Senate, this fact alone in our opinion puts this woman's story in grave doubt. Moore's admission of his penchant for teenagers as a 30 year old however gave just enough credence to the story to add fuel to the fire. The Democrat hatchet men went looking for more stories.  

Some of these stories were quite salacious, but most were false involving for instance an incident in a parking lot which parking lot never existed. One woman however claimed Moore had signed her high school yearbook and had written some semi-sleazy comment there. When Moore denied having done this and when Republicans began demanding an independent handwriting analysis, famous political ambulance chaser and professional public spectacle Gloria Alred inserted herself into the case.

Despite Alred's interference, the woman was forced to admit she had forged Moore's writings beneath his signature. This event in our opinion put the stake in the heart of this smear. But the Democrats found an ally in - of all people - a Republican.

Senator Richard Shelby, concerned about the "child molestor' label that Democrats would hang on every Republican who supported Moore urged Alabamans to write in "a Republican" without naming any one specific one. This quote found its way into ads by Democrat front groups, some purporting to be "concerned Republicans".   When the votes were tallied, the margin of victory closely matched the write-in votes. 

One Senate seat can be of enormous consequence. This election was isolated and this enabled the full force of the Democrat political machine to be concentrated on one state.  Even so, the only reason Roy Moore is not the Senator-Elect today is because the Democrats got the other Republican senator scrambling to avoid a perceived stain on the reputation of the Party. 

We believe that to avoid Senate elections which become public circuses, the 17th Amendment to our Constitution ought to be repealed and Senators rather be elected as prescribed originally: by the State legislatures, who would had this been in effect yesterday been able to recall an errant Senator at will. Smear campaigns would be less effective and the general public would have more incentive to take an interest in their State legislatures. It is damn time that it be made much more difficult for people from out of state to whip the residents of a state into a frenzy in order to get a Senator more to the liking of any one national group into office..

Saturday, December 9, 2017

PEARL HARBOR DAY: 76TH ANNIVERSARY

Two days ago came the 76th Anniversary of the Japanese sneak attack on Pearl Harbor which threw the United States headlong into the deadliest conflict the world has ever seen. 

Admiral Isoroku Yamamoto was the architect of the attack, which he objected to; saying "I can run wild in the South Pacific for six months. After that..." 

Yamamoto knew whereof he spoke. He was American educated at Harvard and had seen the expanse of this nation and its resources. He also knew the American character. Nevertheless he followed his orders and carried out the dastardly deed. 

We declared war on Japan, and in response Hitler and Mussolini declared war on us (although the treaty under which Hitler declared war only required him to do so if Japan were attacked by us).

During the course of the war we found out where Yamamoto was going to be on a date certain and sent a squadron of American P-38 fighters after his plane. They caught up to him somewhere around Bougaineville and Isoroku Yamamoto wound up burning to death in the shot-up wreckage of his Mitsubishi "Betty" bomber/transport.

In May of 1944, about 6 months short of four years after Pearl Harbor we and our allies accepted the unconditional surrender of Nazi Germany. Three months and two very famous nuclear detonations later Japan gave up. 

Sixty years later, on September 11 2001 we were again attacked by surprise, with the death toll being approximately the same. This present war has lasted much longer than four years, mostly because a pack of hand-wringing wimps has managed to prolong it by emphasizing the need to avoid insulting THE ENEMY. 

Here's an idea: treat the present enemy like we treated the enemy in 1941. THEN after we beat them into submission maybe we could be pals, like we are with Japan today. But not before, and don't give me that crap about how we can't do that anymore. This is war, and these hand=wringing wimps are seditionists at best. Lock them up and then get busy cleaning up. 

(We apologize for not posting this on December 7th, but circumstances prevented it.)

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