THE NUTTY NAZI WHO NAMED HIS KIDS AFTER HITLER AND HIMMLER GETS HIS KIDS BACK

I was writing my next novel ("A Piper for Danny") on Monday with the news playing on the TV in back of me when I heard that this hammerhead who had his kids taken from him because he named them "Adolf Hitler" and (I think) "Heinrich Himmler"

 

I can't remember this goofball's name or exactly where he lives, and since he is basically an inconsequential moron I can't be bothered to look it up. (He's basically the  kind of guy who will do something to make himself a public spectacle and I'll say: "oh, yeah, that moron" and go back to what I was doing).

 

The news reader said that the man had regained custody of his sons, and then said that he appeared in court in "a German uniform". That caused me to turn around and look. Holy crap. What a get-up he was wearing.

 

"German uniform" my ass. The Nazis were very bad guys, but the uniforms were designed to look sharp and mean business. This "uniform" bore the insignia of at least four branches of the National Socialist state. Imagine this:

 

First off, the jerk had a six-inch swastika tatooed on the left side of his neck in red.

 

Next, the ensemble was based on a jacket and trousers of the color and cut of a Class-A Waffen SS officer's uniform.  But the collar ornaments were the elongated Roman numeral II in Afrika Korps camouflage denoting a field-grade Army (Heer) officer. 

 

But wait, there's more!

 

Every single department, agency, service, and branch of the Nazi regime had its own version of the "Reichsadler" or national eagle. This guy must be nuts about eagles.

 

Above the left breast pocket was the Kreigsmarine (Navy) eagle clutching a wreath and swastika. On his upper right sleeve was the Waffen-SS eagle with the pointy wings (That emblem belongs on the left shoulder)

 

To top it off, on his left arm - where for a change it belongs - was a swastika armband. But it was not the simple red armband with a black swastika in a white circle (which was worn with the black uniform of the regular SS, but not the Waffen-SS so, WRONG AGAIN). Rather it was an armband with a gold border above and below, further bedecked with a border on the insides of the gold bands consisting of oak leaves intertwined with acorns. That armband was worn by persons working for the Party Chancellory under Martin Bormann.

 

Over all what the moron was wearing was not a "German uniform". It was a bad (albeit well-tailored) Halloween costume. It looked what Oleg Cassini would have come up with if Hitler had asked him to design a "uniform" for wannabes.

 

By the bye, why is it that all these "Nazis" in this country all wear some loose parody of SS or SA officer's insignia? Where are their troopers? After all, an officer without any enlisted underlings is what we call here in America "all hat and no cattle".  This nutbar's uniform was the equivalent of some dude walking down the street in chaps, boots, and jingly spurs with no horse in sight.

 

Well, as they say accentuate the positive. So on a positive note, this "Nazi" would have Hitler rolling over in his grave if Hitler hadn't had his flunkies cremate him in a ditch (That's who this moron idolizes? Sheesh) so, good.

 

Anyway, the dude got his boys back. Something tells me that their stories won't end well. Maybe raising teenagers will straighten his head out. This family is in desparate need of prayer. Gentle readers, please provide that to this woefully misguided soul and his family.