HERMAN CAIN

HERE AT THE ALEXANDRIA DAILY POOP, WE STILL THINK THAT RICK PERRY WILL BECOME THE NEXT PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES. However, Herman Cain may well prove us wrong.

We certainly hope that Mr. Cain will win the nomination and wrest the White House from "president" Obama. Cain is what we call a "straight shooter". If you ask Cain what time it is, he won't try to put you to sleep with a lecture on how to build a watch. And if nominated he will beat Obama like a rented mule.

The statists on the Left know this, and fear Cain. They want Mitt Romney, whom we here at the ADP believe to be the most likely Republican to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.

And so the Left is on the attack. They have now stooped to the lowest of the low, a sexual smear campaign. This campaign is based on some nebulous claim that one or two women were given settlements in some kind of contremps that allegedly involved allegations of alleged "sexual harassment" (which these days could mean some guy complimenting some gal on her clothing!) The "Settlements" have been said to be in the "five-figure" range.

FIVE FIGURES??? FIVE???? THAT'S ALL??? That's mighty cheap for a sex-harassment suit involving a top executive in a major Washington lobbying group. If there were any substance behind such an accusation ANY D.C. shyster worth his salt could have gotten half-a-million AT LEAST; and that's even BEFORE Cain became a household name.

Our guess is that these women were screwups who were on the verge of getting fired, managed to trump up and blow out of proportion some such thing as Cain giving them a wink as a compliment on a job well-done (for a change) and made such a pain in the ass of themselves that they were allowed to resign and paid some small severance pay on the condition that they shut up and go away (which explains the non-disclosure order that supposedly prevents them from coming forward).

Some lawyer claiming to represent the women claims that they want to come forward but cannot get the non-disclosure agreement nullified. Meanwhile other sources say the women just want to be left alone. (We can't blame them. There is nothing to this allegation and they know that if they come forward it will not enrich them but rather blow up in their faces.)

For his part Cain says that this is just an effort to get him to shut up and, as Cain said;

"IT AIN'T GONNA WORK."

In our opinion, this non-scandal will go down in history as the desperate groping of the Statist Left as their grasp on power slips. The poor, deluded Lefties. They really thought they could game the system of government so ingeniously laid out by the Founders of this Republic. One has to give them credit, they tried. They almost succeeded. But "nearly" as they say only gives success in horseshoes and hand grenades. The gears of our system of government were cleverly designed to crush even the largest monkey wrench thrown into them. Freedom of speech is the chief wrench-breaker. The Alexandria Daily Poop is proud to be part of that.