Monday, October 3, 2011

FASTER THAN THE SPEED OF LIGHT (Mr. Einstein, meet Mr. Newton)

Recently a group of physics scientists reported they had detected evidence that a sub-atomic particle had traveled faster than the speed of light. The article I read contained a rather snorey and nebulous explanation of the phenomenon, but the upshot is that Einstein's Theory of Relativity states that it is impossible for an object to travel faster than the speed of light (E=MC2 or Energy equals (consists of) matter traveling at the speed of light squared is just one part of the theory.) SO if a particle can travel faster than the speed of light, Einstein's whole theory is reduced to bullshit.

Now, Yours Truly is not no physical science maven nohow no way. But I do know enough about that sort of thing to know that physicists have for decades argued about the existence of "dark matter". "Dark matter" is physical mass that is undetectable but that the presence of which is the only feasible explanation for the gravitational force which keeps the universe from flying apart willy-nilly.

As I said, Einstein posited that energy is just mass traveling at the speed of light, squared. Enter Issac Newton, who posited the idea of entropy, that everything is acted upon by outside forces that will eventually slow everything to a dead stop.

Now if entropy is true, then wherever energy is released it travels through an environment which offers some kind of resistance through the gravitational pull of mass. As Newton said, mass traveling at the speed of light squared will continue to do so until it is acted upon by an outside force. Cannot light itself be bent by gravity? And is it not correct that the amount of matter in the universe is constant?

Given this, the Poop Theory of Dark Matter is that sub-atomic particles observed traveling at more than the speed of light are bits of energy which have been slowed by entropy and are transitioning to pure mass again. And while the release of energy is concentrated at the point of release and is dramatic, the slowing of it is spread out over time and space and is so much less so as to be all but imperceptible to man-made instruments. Yet it exists, and "dark matter" consists of these transitional particles.

Now if any of you eggheads out there find what I have posited here to be true, then you damn well share that Nobel for Science with me, 50/50. And you will call it "The Poop Theory of Dark Matter" (boy, the jokes you could make about that). Fail to do so and I will sue your ass off.

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