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Thursday, January 1, 2009

HAPPY NEW YEAR - YEAH, YEAH.

Folks, I drive a cab for a living. So guess how I spent my New Year's Eve??

The first part of the evening was natch picking up folks and taking them to where they were going to celebrate. Half the time they didnt show because they called two or three cab companies and took the first one that showed or some other idiotic (and inconsiderate ) thing. The second half of the evening would have been spent taking them home, but practically no one knew how to act, and about half of them wanted to stuff their whole party of ten or twelve into my Crown Vic. Everybody was totally blotto.

It didn't used to be this way. Up until about three years ago people would act right; maybe get a little drunk but they could still find their ass without using both hands, a map and a Sherpa guide. They certainly didn't try to hail a cab by runnig in front of the moving vehicle and doing jumping jacks in the middle of the street OR - no shit - JUMPING ON THE HOOD OF THE MOVING CAB. Well, in any case I decided to go home and take a little nap and run the hotels at check-out time.

All this left me in no mood to write anything, but if you're a blogger and worth your salt, you MUST write a New Year's Day post. SO:

I got to thinking why the rise in idiotic behavior?? Why are people such dopes these days??

Look at what people are driving more and more: "Plug-in hybrids" with an eye toward a fully electric car. It is painfully obvious that no one has thought this through. I will admit that using the brakes to generate power has merit, although when some weenie starts slowing down half a mile before the light (with a smirk on his face reminiscent of a toddler who has just pooped in the potty and thinks he deserves a prize) in order to re-charge his precious battery (and force everyone else to waste gasoline, since neither he nor the folks behind him will make the timed light) it infuriates me along with everybody else. But first off, you don't plug those hybrids into the ground. Pick your poison, you are STILL burning oil OR fissioning Uranium to make your buggy go. AH! But at least you're not giving your money to "BIG OIL".

Unless your utility uses an oil-fired power plant, you are right. You are giving your hard earned dough to Big Coal or Big Nuke. Sure you are not paying that "greedy gas station owner". But when you start using your home elecric outlet as a fuel source, you'll feel all smug until you get your electric bill, whereupon you will shit your pants. And if you don't pay for your electric car's fuel, your power gets cut off. Not just your car power; your lights and heat and stove and refrigerator and freezer all conk out too. My food won't spoil and I won't freeze in the dark if I cant afford gasoline.

Not only that, but what about your bicycle owning neighbor who doesn't own a car? Mass use of electricity as a motor fuel will cause the price of electric power to rise for EVERYBODY, not you only.

Oh well; its a sacrifice everyone must make for a cleaner environment, right?? Burning less gasoline will end global warming and save those cute cuddly Polar bears, right?? YOU FUCKING IDIOT. Do you know why the gasoline engine was developed?? Because when oil is refined for other uses, gasoline is a byproduct of the refining. And petroleum products are used in among other things the plastics that lighten mass rail transit cars to improve efficiency, as well I might add as to make the tires of those bikes your soon-to-be-overcharged-for-electricity neighbor rides to be so goddamned "green". Before they put the gasoline to good use as a transportation fuel, it was just burned off. So even if you eliminate the internal combustion engine you will STILL be burning gasoline, only it won't be doing anything useful. Genius.

AND aside from all this, "Man made global warming" (Or, since it is becoming evident temperatures are dropping "climate change") is a complete crock of shit. The climate is constantly changing and it isnt us, it is the sun and various other natural features. I was raised in a part of Ohio that was covered in ice millions of years ago. It was warm and dry way before the first hiccups of the Industrial Revolution. Oh and by the way for all you dumb asses who want to cry for the cute cuddly widdo Polar bears drowning and losing their ice-floe hunting grounds: You do believe in evolution? Adaption is a big part of it. The bears need to evolve. And bye the bye a Polar bear is about ten feet tall on its hind legs and has been known to hunt and eat human beings. FUCK THE POLAR BEARS.

Nah, I take it back. I actually feel sorry for the polar bears. I dont know exactly how to make this into an analogy, but basically you people who want to "save the planet" from this moronic "man-made climate change" are the same folks who rail against "Big Oil" and "Big Tobacco"; even though Shell has never handed down a government order or taxed one American individual (and spare me, you morons) and R.J.Reynolds has never imprisoned or executed anyone. To save you from Big Oil and Big Tobacco, you fools turn to the one entity that can screw your life up with no remedy. And you can get rid of your car (and I guess ride a bike made out of hemp??) and you can refuse to smoke or quit. You can say "no" to Big Oil and Big Tobacco. But once Big Government has you, it has you by the BALLS. Yet you fools look to Big GOVERNMENT to save you from Big Oil and Big Tobacco The poor polar bears. If I were a polar bear looking foir the likes of you idiots to save me, I would just as soon swim out to sea and drown.

Happy Fucking New Year.

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